10 Signs That A Trend Is Dead

If you have to ask, it’s probably too late. Trends come and go, and if you spend too much time trying to keep up, you never will. But there are some things you can do to try to whackproof your style and stay ahead of the menswear curve. Ultimately, you should probably just wear whatever the hell you want, but at some point you might have to ask yourself: are these wingtips still acceptable?

Look, we love cool new stuff as much as the next guy, that’s what we’re here for, so before you get your selvedge panties in a bunch, remember that this is all for good fun. Check out these 10 signs that a trend is dead, just don’t read too carefully, you might get offended.

Written by Noah Johnson (@noahvjohnson)

Nothing kills a trend like an article about it. A piece in the New York Times Style Section is enough to make you want to dump everything in your closet in a Salvation Army bin and wear nothing but sweats and Air Force 1s for the rest of your life. Just think about an aging, suburb-dwelling editor in a newsroom somewhere trying to put his fat, wrinkled finger on the “pulse”, asking himself, “What’s hip with the kids these days?” The answer is the opposite of whatever he comes up with. These articles attempt to coin phrases and trace the cultural etymology of popular trends so that your grandparents can understand them, stripping away any semblance of cool in the process. So long, skater chic.

You want to make your high-end brand more accessible (read: you want to make more money off of your high-end brand name)? Go for it. It’s always been your dream to have your brand sold at the mall, right? Make it cheaper, sell more, reach a wider audience. Just kiss your credibility goodbye and watch the “trend” that made it famous whirlpool down the drain. Inclusivity equals ubiquity, and ubiquity, we all know, equals wack. Equally dangerous is when an established brand sprouts an offshoot. These up-branded capsule collections are like trend-seeking missiles.

Sure, it starts as an aesthetic… Americana, workwear, Ivy League, whatever it is, but eventually it becomes a selling point. A marketing gimmick. A strategy. There’s no way to avoid this one really—why shouldn’t the stuff you love be used against you to make someone else rich?

Made in the USA, or better yet, Made in Japan, or even better than both, Made in the USA with Japanese materials. Don’t get it twisted, if you’re going to open your wallet, you should think about what and who you are supporting. But it’s like food. Organic, grown local, free-range… It’s all good, but at some point you gotta say: “Just give me something that tastes good. Don’t stuff a bunch of rhetorical garbage down my throat along with it.” Are you buying something that actually looks good on you, or are you buying into a prefab look?

You know that feeling when you walk into a party and you’re feeling pretty fresh? Brand new sneakers (rare ones) and a snapback that you just copped, only to find that some other fool is rocking the same gear? And he looks like a tool. Yeah, that sucks. Now imagine that times a million.

One thing that the Internet has done is made is super easy for any guy to dress well. Follow a few of the "right" menswear blogs and you’re all set. So, now every guy dresses “well.” In other words, every guy dresses the same, and the more they dress that way, the more shit they buy, the more brands and shops make and sell that shit, and the perpetual cycle of white soled boots, colored chinos and chambray shirts goes on ad infinitum. (You might be thinking, “but those things are classic, been around for years, decades, even,” let me assure you, friend, five years ago it wasn’t so easy to find a pair of slim chinos or a well-fitting oxford shirt.)

Say what you will about the sneaker and hoodie craze of the early aughts, at least there was some differentiation.

Have you seen what they did to Jonah Hill? That dude used to be hilarious. More importantly, he used to be a hilarious fat schlub. Now he looks like the ‘after’ photo of a contestant on a reality fat loss/makeover TV show. Awkward and uncomfortable. Adding to the discomfort is the slicked menswear sidepart, stiff boots, and corset-fit button down. Who is the sadistic stylist that did this to him? I’ll tell you who, it was Johnny Trendrider. This should serve as a reminder that buying the all right shit doesn’t earn you any real style, just a real expensive outfit.

The same dudes that dig up the brands and styles that everyone gets buck for are ultimately the ones who will kill it dead. Menswear blogging is a cannibalistic world, so dabble in it cautiously, and resist the temptation to dress to maximize your street style photo potential. If you see yourself in your RSS feed it’s time to move on dot org dot edu dot gov.

Many of the trends currently manifested in men’s style are bigger than just chambray shirts and jeans. Heritage brands and conscientious consumerism are movements, not just selling points. But this has spawned a whole new vocabulary for menswear, a questionable one at that. Handmade. Organic. Crafted. Possibly the very worst modifier and the most commonly abused is Authentic. Capital A.

It’s not like you have to be on Everest to rock a down parka and hiking boots, or be in a factory to wear a workshirt and canvas pants—but it’s time to check your shit when you’re wardrobe becomes so Authentic that you’re a walking period piece. And if you look like you bought all of your clothes at Tractor Supply for $60 except you actually bought them online and spent over $600, you should probably take some time away from your credit card to find yourself.

Those fast fashion retailers are great for recession era bankrolls, but they aren’t great for maintaining the integrity of your personal style. It’s a total bummer when the handmade Moccasins you had special ordered and waited six months for show up on the shelf at Urban Outfitters. Suddenly your little world of cool style is huge, and every dipshit with a credit line is rocking the same gear as you. To make matters worse, your favorite mid-high-end-range brand (the one you preciously only bought during the last week of sale season at Barney’s) is now doing a double label with Uniqlo, watering down pieces you currently have in rotation and making them available to the plebian masses.

Historical accuracy is important when you’re writing a term paper, or making an indie film about the life of Wild Bill Hickok, not so much when you get dressed. Not to limited your freedom of expression, but if you look like an actual lumberjack, or a 1920s railworker, or an overdressed carpenter but you’re actually a blogger, you might want to remove a few layers before you leave the house.

As far as menswear goes, one sure fire way to make any totally ordinary thing seem extraordinary is slap a bunch of extra names on the label. Since when did anyone know the name of the denim mill or leather tannery or a friggin’ sole manufacturer? Knowledge is power, but when it comes to your clothes, knowing a lot amounts to not so much. What would your grandfather say if you ask him what kind of leather his belt was made from? Maybe it’s time to find a better way to get dressed.