I want to wear this BDU shirt from Wacko Maria all the time and just smoke really nicely rolled joints in a little concrete courtyard in a bustling South East Asian city that’s around fifteen minutes from the ocean where there’s always fresh citrus and joss sticks burning. Eventually GQ would send a correspondent all the way out to this remote-ass city to do a profile on me and my multi-million dollar medicinal marijuana operation and I wear this shirt throughout the interview. I would be very recalcitrant during the course of the interview but in a really charming way that makes me come across as guarded and a little wounded rather than stand-offish and dickish. The crux of the story will be how I eschewed fame and fortune for a quiet, contemplative agrarian lifestyle. The title would be something like, “Something something something, How Jon Moy Disappeared in a Cloud of Smoke.”