I've decided that Carhartt and/or Carhartt WIP needs to sponsor my soccer team. I will wear this coach's jacket on the sidelines and the kids will wear, like, duck cotton warmups and when they score the team will do elaborate carpentry and construction-themed celebrations. Despite the corporate sponsorship and the eventual antagonizing from the one cranky accounts manager who is seeing just how expensive a team that is coached and most likely general managed by me really is, my coaching style would remain very relaxed. I'd even let the kids give all the set plays their own names. A coach letting their team pick any kind of name pretty much guarantees that they will be screaming "SHITASS! RUN SHITASS! NOT FUCCBOI, SHITASS!" at the start of a corner kick.