Ahhh, The Oscars. What an occasion to celebrate the accomplishments in filmmaking from the past year, right? Or is it more of an excuse to just watch a full-blown circle jerk of celebrities congratulating and big-upping one another who they actually hate behind the scenes? Either way, it's six whole fucking hours of mostly boring ass television that really isn't worth it. BUT if you're looking for elegance and beauty, this is the place to be. The stars were out last night and a bunch of them were really sexy looking cosmic entities who would force even the most self-aggrandizing individuals like us to shrink into cowering lames. Let's check out who looked good and separate them from the corniest lords this side of Camelot.