Top Shelf Cheese Plates

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Complex Original

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When I'm invited to a party or event, the first thing I look for on the invite is what I'm going to get for free. I know you're thinking, "Word, free booze makes for a good party." But no, you're not wrong. See, the best thing to see when invited to a party is some variation on the phrase "food will be served." That food could be "small plate tapas," "hors d'oeuvres," or even "finger foods." If any of those phrases are listed, I'm going. I could give a fuck about free booze. I can get a 40 of OE at the bodega around the corner and be set. But if there's food there, you can bet I'm rolling through, smashing the shrimp cocktail bar and throwing a few extra in the Ziploc baggies I brought for leftovers. But to look like I'm not a total mooch, I'll be dressed in this Rick Owens topcoat to reinforce my classy (read: pinky out) reputation. It has a rayon/wool body with nylon sleeves and sides for super stealthy leftover scooping and it hits right above the knees—the perfect length for a topcoat because I'm not in the business of looking like a streaker or the next white dude to audition for the titular role in The Punisher. With five cuff buttons, I won't be afraid of getting my hands dirty as I try all the various types of top shelf cheeses, from Gruyere to Gorgonzola.

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