In probably one of the least surprising happenings of 2016, things in Rio proved to be pretty awful when athletes arrived at the Olympic Village this weekend. The athletes are pissed about it, the coaches are pissed about it, and team officials are pissed about it.
In his eyes, Rio de Janeiro mayor Eduardo Paes had the perfect solution to the Aussie party’s problem: Just give them a kangaroo so they’ll stop complaining about the crappy living conditions.
Luckily Kitty Chiller, head of the Australian Olympic team, had a clapback on the Australian morning show The Grill Team that will maybe help lead Paes in a more helpful direction:
“We’ve already got a kangaroo, we don’t need another one. Get me a plumber mate, get me a plumber," Chiller said.
And it’s not just the Aussies who aren’t okay with what’s going on in their rooms. The Philippine team’s Chef-de-mission Jose Romasanta also complained of leaky pipes, low water pressure, and uncomfortable and small beds.
“The organizers will hear it from some delegates,” Romasanta told ABS-CBN sports.
On top of the deplorable living conditions in the athlete’s quarters, getting to and from events could present another ordeal. It could take track and field athletes upwards of an hour or more to get to the stadium, which means athletes will have to wake up stupid early to compete and will most likely have difficulties traveling back and forth between their quarters. USA Track and Field CEO Max Siegel called it “probably one of our biggest concerns.”
The situation has become such a headache that one of the U.S.’s most high profile athletes definitely won’t be staying in the village. Decathlon champion Ashton Eaton’s agent said he’s trying to find alternate housing and transportation for the Olympian because round trip between the village and the venues could take upwards of three hours.
If that wasn’t bad enough, just getting to the Olympic Village itself might be a minor miracle for athletes and fans alike considering the road that connects the airport to the Olympic Village is referred to as “The Highway of Terror,” due to the gang violence on the highway and its surrounding neighborhoods.
Rio’s reputation for being a violent and crime-ridden city has already been witnessed firsthand by one unfortunate athlete. New Zealand Jiu-jitsu Olympian Jason Leewas “kidnapped” by people dressed as cops last week, which seems like maybe one of the worst ways to be welcomed into a city.
To almost no one’s surprise, it turns out the Rio Olympics might actually be just as screwed as Stephen Colbert said they would be.