Bills-Lions Laser Pointer Douche Has Been Caught, Is Now Banned From Games

One laser is worth a thousand bans.

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The Lions may have taken the L against the Bills this pastw eekend, but their security team came out with a win today: the laser point vandal from Sunday's game has been caught.

Let's backtrack a bit: you may recall that Bills head coach Doug Marrone claimed that, at several points in the game, his players were distracted by a green laser pointer coming from the stands. Bills kicker Dan Carpenter missed a key 50-yard field goal, possible because a green dot appeared on holder Colton Schmidt. Buffalo QB Kyle Orton also complained to the officials during the game about the extracurricular fan distraction.

Normally reserved for terrorizing cats and entertaining bored college students in lecture halls, laser pointers can now be added to the list of seemingly innocuous gadgets that can make you like look like an asshole in public. We're looking at you, Google Glass.

Thankfully and hilariously, the Lions took this very seriously, and now the laser bandit has been caught and subsequently banned from all future Detroit games. This according to FOX Sports 1 NFL Insider Mike Garafolo, who tweeted the following: 


At the end of the day, the laser pointer wielder didn't even affect the final outcome of the game: Carpenter stepped up and kicked the game-winning 58-yard field goal with not a laser in sight.

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