The Seattle Sounders announced the signing of someone named Andreas Ivanschitz on Tuesday, a 31-year-old Austrian who "is a skilled and dynamic player that has proven his abilities in some of Europe’s top domestic leagues and at the international level," according to the team's general manager and president of soccer.
But the Portland Timbers don't care about any of that.
All they appeared to be interested in once they got word of the news were the phonetics of this person's name, which allowed them to make a (somewhat obvious) shit joke at their rival's expense.
Deuce, of course, is Clint Dempsey, who calls himself that when he slips into his hip-hop persona.
Send all complaints, compliments, and tips to firstname.lastname@example.org.