Kobe Bryant's 15 Most Epic Trash-Talking Moments

Image via Complex Original

Victim: Bow Wow

Bow Wow may have starred in Like Mike back in 2002. And he may have dominated the court in his music video for the song, "Basketball." But when the Cash Money rapper challenged Kobe to a game of 1-on-1 back in 2011, he stood absolutely no chance. He couldn't score on Kobe or keep up with his trash talking.

"I'm gonna call [Lil] Wayne!" Kobe yelled as he scored point after point after point. "I'm gonna tell Wayne!"

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Victim: Tim Duncan

The idea of Kobe and Duncan talking trash sounds like it'd be laughable. Surely, Tim Duncan doesn't talk trash, right? But according to Kobe, he does—and he more than holds his own. Kobe got the best of him during a Lakers/Spurs game back in 2013, though, after Duncan called him out for taking too many shots during a game.

"I said, 'You know what? I remember beating you guys a few times in the playoffs,'" Kobe revealed later. "He said, 'Well, yeah, you got us a couple times.' I said, 'You know what? I think my ring count is a little higher than yours.' It was like two old dogs just barking back and forth at each other."

Duncan has since won his fifth ring and pulled even with Kobe. But back when this happened, Kobe knew exactly what to say to shut him up.

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Victim: Allen Iverson

Can you imagine what would happen if two guys talked trash like this today during an NBA Finals game? Kobe would receive a technical foul. AI would receive a technical foul. Hell, Derek Fisher was actually trying to separate the two and keep the peace and even he would probably receive a technical foul. You can't really do this during an NBA game anymore. But this illustrates just how intense those 2001 NBA Finals were—and proves that Kobe has never backed down from anyone on the court.

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Victim: A Mavericks heckler

"HEY, KOBE, YOU SUCK!" [Kobe turns around, counts his rings, and then goes back to thinking about how many times he's torched the Mavericks over the years]

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Victim: Ron Artest

First of all, this is classic Ron Artest. There's only 28 seconds left in the game and the Lakers are up six and Artest is yelling, "You're not ready for me," at Kobe. Ready for what exactly, Ron? Kobe hit him back with a fitting response: "You're a stand-up comedian now?" Oh, and for good measure, he also finished the game with 37 points, six assists, and five rebounds. Turns out, he was more than ready for Artest.

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Victim: Jamie Foxx

Jamie Foxx is a Mavericks fan. So the first time he met Kobe backstage at one of his shows, Kobe gave him a lot of grief for riding for Dallas. And a short time after leaving the show, he also sent Foxx a text to inform him that he was going to do everything in his power to prevent the Mavericks from winning a title.

"One day," he wrote, "you'll choke on my fifth ring."

He backed up his tough talk, too, by winning his fifth ring the following year.

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Victims: Jodie Meeks, Smush Parker, Chris Mihm, and Kwame Brown

Kobe has always been hard on his teammates. He feels like it's his job to push them and force them to be as good as they can be. But following a practice in October 2012, he went extra hard on a few of his current and former teammates.

"Smush Parker was the worst," he said when he was asked about his former running mate. "He shouldn't have been in the NBA, but we were too cheap to pay for a point guard."

"I was shooting 45 times a game," he said when he was asked about the 2011-12 season. "What was I supposed to do? Pass it into Chris Mihm and Kwame Brown?"

"I've been murdering that dude," he said when he was asked about Jodie Meeks. "I've been kicking his ass. I've been torching that motherfucker."

Geez, Kobe. Why don't you tell everyone how you really feel?

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Victim: Kevin Durant and James Harden

During the 2011-12 season, the Thunder were really feeling themselves. They were making their way towards the 2012 NBA Finals, and Kevin Durant, Russell Westbrook, and James Harden were all playing at a very high level. So during a February 2012 game against the Lakers, which they won, KD and Harden got into it with Kobe. And Kobe was quick to put them both in their place.

"Maybe one day they'll be able to sit at my lunch table," he said later.

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Victim: LeBron James

After the Lakers won the 2010 NBA Finals, Kobe wasn't happy that LeBron was stealing the spotlight with his impending free agency. So just prior to "The Decision," Kobe sent LeBron a text that went a little something like this: "Go ahead and get another MVP, if you want. And find the city you want to live in. But we're going to win the championship. Don't worry about it."

Unfortunately, neither of them won the title the next year—Jamie Foxx and the Mavericks got their revenge on Kobe!—but this added an interesting wrinkle to the ongoing Kobe vs. LeBron saga.

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Victim: Kyrie Irving

At the time that this video was shot, Irving only had one year of NBA experience under his belt. But it didn't stop him from telling Kobe that he wanted to play him 1-on-1…for $50,000. Kobe was incredulous when he heard what Irving had in mind and seemed stunned at how bold he was.

"You really think you can beat me 1-on-1?" he asked. "Are you crazy?"

"You're not going to lock me down!" Irving replied.

"Easy money!" Kobe said later, before telling Irving that he was "about the same size" as Bow Wow. "Easy money! Easy money! Easy money!"

Easy, Kobe.

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Victim: President Obama

If you're going to be one of the best trash talkers of all time, you have to be willing and able to talk trash to anyone, including Presidents. MJ proved this when he talked trash to Bill Clinton during a game of golf. And Kobe did, too, during a trip to the White House in 2010 after the Lakers won their second consecutive NBA title. President Obama threw a jab at Kobe, joking that Bulls point guard Derrick Rose "may have your number." Kobe responded with a jab of his own.

"If he calls that number," he said, "I'll be sure to pick up after the fifth ring."

The President must have kicked himself later for not going with an easier MJ/six rings joke instead.

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Victim: Ricky Rubio

Most of the trash-talking that Kobe directs at other NBA players takes place on the court. But after a Lakers/Timberwolves game in January 2012, Kobe got into it with Rubio—a member of the Spanish national team—when he spotted him talking with his teammate Pau Gasol about the 2012 Summer Olympics.

"You know you're getting the silver medal," Rubio told Kobe. "You know that."

"Shiiiiiiit!" Kobe responded. "I'm taking bets. If I win, I get the keys to Barcelona."

We all know who won that bet.

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Victim: Dwight Howard

It's not exactly a secret that Kobe and Howard didn't get along during their brief stint together back in 2012 and 2013. Even though they tried to downplay it, there was noticeable tension between the two. And once they parted ways after just one season, Kobe didn't even try to hide his disdain for Howard anymore. Just check out the video above, which features Kobe calling Howard "soft as a motherfucker" during a game earlier this season. It's pretty obvious why they couldn't coexist as teammates, huh?

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Victims: Nick Young and his Lakers teammates

Dwight Howard isn't the only player that Kobe labeled as "soft" this season. During a Lakers practice back in December, Kobe also called his current teammates "soft like Charmin" during an epic shit-talking session that started after Nick Young tried to talk trash to Kobe.

"Now I see why we've lost so many games!" Kobe yelled. "We're soft like Charmin!"

"These motherfuckers aren't doing shit for me," he yelled at Lakers general manager Mitch Kupchak later, before explaining himself to reporters. "I think Nick probably regrets getting me started in practice and saying something."

Um, ya think?

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Victim: Michael Jordan

Kobe has never eclipsed MJ when it's come to trash talking, but he's also never backed down from the challenge. During the 2003 NBA All-Star Game, Kobe and MJ went at it. And back in July 2012, after MJ said he "laughed" when he heard Kobe say that he thought the 2012 U.S. men's basketball team could beat the 1992 Dream Team, Kobe wasn't afraid to mix it up with the G.O.A.T.

"So what?" he told reporters when they told him what MJ said. "He knows I'm a bad motherfucker. I'm not really tripping."

Yes, you are, Kobe. One of the baddest ever.

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