Image via Complex Original
As sneakers and the culture and community surrounding them continues to grow, the number of lames that somehow find their way into becoming a "sneakerhead" seems to multiply at exponential rates. Quick, look around. Is it you? Is it the guy that posts pics of the full size runs he rolled out of the mall that kept you from that latest release? Is it the guy that can't handle someone else getting hooked up with a pair of kicks? Is it the kid camping for kicks with no intention to ever wear them?
Check out the 10 Signs You're a Lame Sneakerhead, so you can avoid it. Or for some of you, improve your lame game.
You Cry Publicly When You Miss Out On Releases
Your Twitter and Facebook timelines are strictly used for bitching about releases you couldn't get, and how Twitter RSVPs aren't fair and how shops only hook up their friends. We get it, it sucks sometimes, but don't make it worse by whining about it. Take the L and move on.
You Say "I Need Those" For Every Hype Release
Copped. Copped. Copped. You're the real life version of Sh*t Sneakerheads Say and it's true, you live in your mom's basement. If you actually bought a pair of kicks every time you said "copped," your place would look more like a Foot Locker warehouse and less like a wannabe bachelor pad.
You Tell Everyone How Much of a Sneakerhead You Are
Please, tell us how much you love sneakers and how talented you are at being a sneakerhead, because that's when we know you've made it. What's really funny is that the more of a sneakerhead you really are, the less you want to ever be called one.
You Talk About The Good Old Days...Which Was When Your Mom Bought You Sneakers
Sure, it was great to see MJ playing in the OGs and your mom probably hooked it up nicely, but times have changed. Deal with it and you could get hooked up by Bieber himself, and that would make Mom prouder than you begging for sneaker money. (Plus, you know what you miss most about being a kid? Being a kid.)
You Only Know Sneakers By Their Nicknames
"Breds." "Grinches." "Jedis." "Kennedys." Sneaker nicknames can make them easier to discuss, but using them all the time is lame. Even lamer is when you make them up. Your ketchup and mustard Foamposite picture got a ton of views...for all the wrong reasons.
You Only Wear One Brand Of Sneakers
It's 2012, so if you're still pushing the idea of wearing just one brand with so many great sneakers to choose from, you better be gettin' paid. Presuming you're one of the 99.99999 percent of the population who isn't, do yourself a favor and expand your horizons.
You Only Think A Sneaker Is Cool After a Celeb Co-Signs It
If it hasn't been "Spotted," you're not interested. MJ never would have imagined fellas buying his sneakers because someone like RIta Ora rocked them. (But have you seen her in those 3s?!?)
The Only Place You Talk To People About Sneakers Is On The Internet
We've reached the point where you can buy, show off, and talk about your sneakers without ever leaving the house. This is all quite convenient — and quite amazing when combined with real-life interactions. Nothing says you're a lame sneakerhead like digital courage. Of course, it also says you're probably socially inept. But you got them Js though!
You Only Wear Shoes To Post A Picture of Them On Social Media
That pair you just scooped up was a must-have, so you posted it on Twitter, Nike Talk, Tumblr, Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram and even Sneakerplay. Breaking news homie, that site has been down for years. What the pic didn't show is you putting them right back in the box and throwing your beaters back on. What's next? Taking your own sneaker paparazzi with you everywhere you go?
That only works for Wale.
You Can't Admit To Being Guilty Of At Least One Thing On This List
What's the fun of poking fun at someone else if you can't poke fun at yourself? It's OK, though. We won't tell anyone.
