Image via Complex Original
The last time I wrote about Black Twitter, several of your cousins tried to curse the kid out. They can all drop dead on a sidewalk on a cold winter's night, because here I am, writing about Black Twitter again. The latest roundup of LOLs includes thoughts on BET's newest drama Being Mary Jane, the Internet sensation Terrio, questions of shade involving Kelly Rowland, and the most high, Beyoncé. Laugh and move on. And remember kids: If you didn't feel validated by this list, there's always some anti-depressant medication with your name on it. Smile.
Michael Arceneaux (@youngsinick) is a writer, but some days when he looks at his student loan debt, wishes he worked at The Players Club. For more of his work, check out The Cynical Ones.
Bleaching Cream Doesn't Love You, Boo
Nigerian-Cameroonian pop musician Dencia has been buzzing all over Twitter following word of her "skin care" line called "Whitenicious." The cream purports to help people of color rid themselves of those annoying dark spots, but once folks caught a look of Dencia before and after using the cream, most concluded that unless you're trying to look like Casper after jogging in the dead of winter (presumably to CVS to get some lotion), this cream ain't it.
Shamu Has His Reasons
Even though I now feel guilty for all of the times I've been taken to Sea World, this makes total sense.
Oooh, Save 'Em
After spotting shots of Terrio in the club, I actually do think someone needs to tap the shoulder of a social worker to check on the kid currently being pimped all over the web. But I did laugh at this tweet. A lot. Maybe I ain't shit. Are you gonna call, though?
Trolling The GOP
Late last year, the GOP made the mistake of tweeting the end of racism from its Twitter account despite their national voter strategy largely being based on suppressing the votes of people who are not old, white men. You would've thought they'd learn their lesson, but evidently not. Since the GOP doesn't especially care for black people voting, Twitter pounced on their disingenuous tweet. I chose this one, because frankly, that last season of Martin was indeed some bullshit.
Check out more here.
A Being Mary Jane Review
BET is trying to make fetch happen with the Gabrielle Union-led drama, Being Mary Jane. Though the made-for-TV movie that served as a backdoor pilot performed well last summer, so far the regular season episodes have experienced a bit of ratings slide—probably because Mary Jane is a hard character to root for. Sure, Olivia Pope is a 'fixer' helping wreck somebody's marriage, but Shonda Rhimes made sure to provide her character with nuance and heart whereas Mary Jane is all "No wonder they kicked you out of Destiny's Child" teases.
The Golden Snub
In the spirit of awards season in which Hollywood's elite praise each other over and over again, I'm using my tweet to illustrate how the night went for the cast of 12 Years A Slave at the Golden Globes. The Hollywood Foreign Press is known for being weird with their selections, so at least Steve McQueen received the highest honor, which is better than no honor at all. Nevertheless, when it comes to the Oscars and Lupita Nyong'o's best supporting actress nod: Don't you be on that bullshit, Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences.
We Miss You, Aaliyah
You're lying if you say you can't picture this. I actually think by the end of the nite, he's doing lazy body rolls in the mirror, winking and blowing kisses to his Aaliyah tattoo like the ultimate creep.
Because, Because, Because...
I don't even know what this is in reference to, but it really doesn't matter because this response is always relevant and forever hilarious.
Why Do You Talk Like That, Trina Braxton?
Anyone who has been to the state of Maryland, or as many of the locals call it, "Murrlyn," knows the state has about as much in common with Canada as Rick Ross does with Prince Harry. No one can figure out exactly why the Maryland-born and bred sister of Toni and Tamar Braxton sounds like she was born a white woman from the mean streets of Quebec, but we do wish she'd knock it off already.
Happy Birthday, Michelle Obama
Isn't love beautiful?
