Image via Complex Original
Thanks to Gawker, we all know the real scandal worth tweeting about is currently unfolding in Toronto. It seems that Rob Ford, the mayor of the largest city in Canada, was videotaped smoking crack cocaine. The tape hasn't been released, but Gawker's John Cook says he's seen it, and that it is definitely Ford toking on the glass pipe.
Ford must now ascend into the pantheon of ratchet politicians, those unscrupulous few who have captured the hearts and minds of the public with wildly out-of-pocket shenanigans.
Who's keeping Ford company now? Obviously, he'll be mostly closely aligned with D.C.'s own crack-smoking mayor, Marion Barry, but there are plenty of others. Find out who as we chronicle Great Moments in Ratchet Politics.
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Best Extramarital Affair on a Boat
The lucky winner: Gary Hart
Office held: U.S. Senator, Colorado (1975-1987)
Year: 1987
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Monkeyed around on his yacht, Monkey Business, with 29-year-old model Donna Rice.
Best Videotaped Crack-Smoking Session in 1990
The lucky winner: Marion "Comeback Kid" Barry
Office held: Mayor of the District of Columbia (1979-1991; 1995-1999)
Year: 1990
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Arrested by the FBI and D.C. police for smoking crack cocaine in a room at the Vista Hotel in the nation's capital.
Best Kept Man of a Lobbyist
The lucky winner: Tom DeLay
Office held: House Majority Leader (1985-2006)
Year: 1996-2006
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Resigned position over charges of money laundering and accepting trips, gifts, and political donations from Republican lobbyist Jack Abramoff.
Best Self-Proclaimed "Model Prisoner"
The lucky winner: Edwin Edwards
Office held: Governor of Louisiana (1972-1980; 1984-1988; 1992-1996)
Year: 1998
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Sentenced to jail time on charges of racketeering, money laundering, and extortion after an investigation of his entire political career. (Bonus ratchet: Married his prison pen pal Trina Grimes Scott after being released from the slammer in 2011.)
Best Use of a Cigar as a Phallic Prop
The lucky winner: Bill Clinton
Office held: President of the United States (1993-2001)
Year: 1998
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Watched and masturbated as White House intern Monica Lewinsky pleasured herself with a cigar.
Best Emailed Request for Oral Sex From a Teenage Page
The lucky winner: Mark Foley
Office held: U.S. House of Representatives, Florida (1995-2006)
Year: 2002
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Sent dirty emails, dick pics, and requests for head to multiple underage pages—for years.
Best Stripper Party, Extramarital Affair Sexts, Assault of a Police Officer, Two Kinds of Fraud, Racketeering, Probably Some Other Stuff We're Forgetting/Don't Know About Yet
The lucky winner: Kwame Kilpatrick
Office held: Mayor of Detroit (2002-2008)
Year: 2002-2008
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Hosted a party at the mayor's mansion, with strippers, one of whom was assaulted by his wife, and later murdered under shady circumstances; sexted his former Chief of Staff and lover Christine Beatty while both were married; assaulted a police officer; racketeered; extorted; committed mail fraud; and evaded taxes.
Best Honest Answers to Hard Questions from Schoolchildren
The lucky winner: Oscar Goodman
Office held: Mayor of Las Vegas (1999-2011)
Year: 2005
The dirty, dirty lowdown: During a visit to Jo Mackey Elementary School, he was asked by a child what he'd bring to a desert island. His response: "A bottle of Bombay Sapphire gin." His favorite pastime: "Drinking Bombay Sapphire gin." (Bonus ratchet points: He took topless photos of Miss January 2001 Irina Voronina for Playboy.com)
Best Bribes Taken From Truckers
The lucky winner: George Ryan
Office held: Governor of Illinois (1999-2003)
Year: 2006
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Spent time in jail after taking bribes from unqualified truck drivers seeking trucking licenses.
Best Attempt to Sell President Obama's Senate Seat
The lucky winner: Rod Blagojevich
Office held: Governor of Illinois (2003-2009)
Year: 2008
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Impeached, then sentenced to 14 years in prison for trying to hand off the vacant Illinois Senate seat to the highest bidder.
Best Attempt to Hide a Love Child
The lucky winner: John Edwards
Office held: U.S. Senator, North Carolina (1999-2005)
Year: 2008
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Ordered a member of his campaign team to get a doctor to fake the DNA results and steal diaper from the baby, whom he had with his mistress Rielle Hunter, to do his own DNA testing.
Best Creepy Dad
The lucky winner: Scott Brown
Office held: U.S. Senator, Massachusetts (2010-2013)
Year: 2010
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Pimped out his teenager daughters during his Senate victory speech.
Best Erect Penis Tweet
The lucky winner: Anthony Weiner
Office held: U.S. House of Representatives, New York (1999-2011)
Year: 2011
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Tweeted a photo of his boxer-briefs-encased package at a college student in Seattle.
Best Videotaped Crack Smoking in 2013
The lucky winner: Rob Ford
Office held: Mayor of Toronto (2010-???)
Year: 2013
The dirty, dirty lowdown: Videotaped smoking crack cocaine from a glass pipe while laughing about Canadian politics.