15 Ways You Can Look More Attractive in Facebook Pictures

Flexing isn't just for the gym anymore people. There are plenty of every day activities that can provide the perfect excuse for you to exhibit your well-maintained pythons. Show off those biceps while brushing your teeth. If you are at a funeral and you have to do one of those solemn "hands clasped in front of you" poses, go ahead and tense up those triceps. Almost any time a camera comes out, you can cross your arms, pop those pecs, and show off the fruits of your bench press labors. Get creative, but remember, if the world notices that you are flexing, your vanity will be revealed, so be subtle when you're making those muscles.

Tanning is the foot binding of our culture. Though beautiful people come with incredibly varied complexions, from Christina Hendricks to Rihanna, our culture has convinced itself that tanning somehow makes you more attractive. Buy into it. Tanning is far easier than actually taking the time to get into shape, and you can't ruin your tan with a bag of potato chips. Sure, the end of the road for a compulsive tanner involves a leathery hide and skin cancer, but can you put a price on convincing yourself that a slightly darker skin tone will make you more attractive? We think not.

Your most attractive moment of the day is the second you step out of the shower. You are glistening. Your wet hair will cooperate rather than fight you at every turn. You can leave a little lather on to cover up any unsightly pimples or moles. Basically, you're half man, half statue. Before you ruin it by drying off, take a selfie. Everybody's doing it. The most successful post-shower selfies are taken with a confused look on one's face, as though you were caught unaware that were taking your own picture. The result will be something that is both playful and sexual. For bonus points, let that towel slip as far down toward your junk as possible without violating Facebook's terms of service, and give the ladies a sneak preview of what they have to look forward to if they ever join you in a bubble bath for two.

Beauty is relative, as in your beauty is relative to the people next to you. So, if you are looking to take a new profile pic, don't hang out with your friends who are models or hunky firemen. Call up your least attractive pals and ask them if they just want to chill. Your unsightly friends will be happy just to get an invite, because, hey, nobody likes to hang out with ugly people, right? They won't suspect a thing when you take out that iPhone and start snapping pics. We know what some of you are thinking, "What if we don't have any friends less attractive than we are?" Don't lose hope. There are always less attractive people out there. If you really want to look sexy in your profile pic, you'll go do whatever you have to do to get the job done.

Many of the gentlemen that read this website like to keep their hair high and tight. Next time you step into the barber's chair, try something different: tell the man to step away from that razor. If you grow your hair out, it can be the gateway to a perfect profile picture. Long hair can be used to hide part of your face. You won't have to worry about being photographed from your bad side because you'll have a natural mask for even the most grotesque aspects of your visage. If there are issues with both sides of your face and you don't want to pull a Cousin It, then might we suggest a Phantom of the Opera style mask? Not only will it cover the most offensive parts of your face, but you'll cultivate an aura of mystery that is irresistible to young sopranos.

Sometimes looking attractive isn't about your physical beauty, but rather it becomes about convincing people that your have more personality than you actually do. Looking off into the distance pensively tells the world that you are super intellectual or deep or whatever. It doesn't matter if the last book your read was Eat, Pray, Love or if you think Kirkegaard is a kitchen utensil, if you look smart in your photos, people will believe that you're smart. You might be wondering what you'll do once the ladies realize you are actually an idiot. We recommend brushing up on trivia and factual tidbits with a few episodes of Jeopardy, and attempting to go to bed with a date as quickly as possible, before she realizes that you aren't nearly as intelligent as the black and white photo of you wearing a scarf and horn-rimmed glasses led her to believe.

For those of you who weren't blessed with enough hair to grow into a luxurious mane, don't worry. Light can also be used to hide your flaws. Turning off the lights on one side of the room or only taking pictures of yourself in dimly lit clubs and bars is a great way to hide parts of your body that you aren't quite ready to show the world. For those of you who are extremely self-conscious, we can recommend placing an extremely harsh light behind you, or using your flash in a mirror selfie so that you can barely see yourself at all. If someone tries to call you out on the fact that they can't actually see you in any of your pictures, tell them that was your intention, your method of artistic expression. Of course, if you want to get laid, people are eventually going to have to see you, but if you meet up with people at the bar as often as possible, they will quickly stop caring what you look like after they've had enough to drink.

Everything looked cooler in the past. Just look at pictures of the Beatles or the Founding Fathers: they look so dope. Unfortunately, we don't have access to a time machine yet. Don't despair, you are always a peasant shirt and an Instagram filter away from looking like you were an extra in a movie about Woodstock. We recommend you take photos with a vintage filter near sunset and in a wheat field if possible, because these are things we associate with the past for some reason. Just be careful, the line between super cool 1960s throwback and looking Amish is incredibly thin. To make sure you get the look you want, avoid wearing straw hats or being photographed in front of barns. Also, a pair of big, stupid aviator glasses will make it clear that you going for retro rather than Mennonite.

Most of your female friends already know this, but it bears repeating: you look your most attractive on Halloween. Halloween is the only night where folks who aren't circus performers are able to hide their flaws behind spandex and distracting bright colors. If you're a guy, you have no excuse not to go for it on All Hallow's Eve: while women are expected to look sexy, men can just write off a failed attempt at looking good as a goofy costume. Once August hits and department stores make way for rows and rows of terribly manufactured costumes, march down to your local K-Mart and buy a child's size super hero outfit. Either you'll be able to show off your pecs without looking like a douche or you'll look really funny. Either way, make sure you post no less than thirty photos of yourself to social media the next day. If you happen to catch any women dressed as sexy Disney princesses in your stream of selfies, feel free to DM me a link on Twitter @muddycreekU.

It goes without saying that none of us writers here at Complex are models. If we had the looks for it, we would get out of the writing game and into the having-your-picture-taken-while-suggestively-milking-a-cow game (we'll give you one guess which one pays better). We defer to our better-looking-betters when it comes to the right poses to look sexy, and we noticed that famous hotties always find ways to get themselves photographed looking back over their shoulder. We have no idea why this is attractive, unless of course you are trying to show off your gluts, but often these photos are only from the neck up. You're just going to have to trust the world's beauties on this one: staring back over your shoulder is a clutch profile pic move.

You've got the muscles, they're just buried under a few extra pounds of cushion. No problem: there is an easy solution that will let you look buff without actually eating vegetables and (God forbid) drinking less beer. Starting buying your shirts a size or two smaller and everything will stay exactly where you want it. If you buy them small enough, you'll have another benefit: cutting off circulation will give your body a ethereal, almost ghostly look, as though you're an extra from Twiglight. There is really no reason to buy shirts that fit you when you can be staging your own free gun show day in and day out underneath your v-neck tee.

We are all for putting your best foot forward, or your best ... something else forward. Twerking has worked for everyone from ex-Disney Channel stars to disgraced school teachers, and there is no reason that it can't work for you. If you are really an Internet self-promotion pro, then you will take the initiative to make an animated GIF of yourself twerking and post that on your wall to accompany the jpeg version that will function as your profile picture. No matter your age, sex, or occupation, a nice twerking GIF will help you win friends and influence people.

Even the least douchey of bros knows that you look your most pumped right after a workout. Every frat dude in the country will tell you that the gym mirror is the perfect place to snap a selfie after you've pumped that iron and downed the day's peanut butter and creatine smoothie. Don't stop at simply snapping a photo in front of the weight rack mirror, take a series of selfies on every single piece of equipment until your find the most flattering pose for your profile picture. Some figures are best flattered by weight belts and squat racks while others look best mid-cable curl. Granted, you might annoy people who actually come to the gym for a serious workout, but there are so few of these types of people out there that this shouldn't present much of a problem.

This is easier for women than men. Many of Facebook's most interesting women have learned long ago that a photo framed with 20 percent face and 80 percent cleavage is often ideal. What do you do if you're a guy? Even if you're pecs are some of the best in the game, they likely aren't going to titillate Facebook friends enough to earn you a poke, let alone a thirsty private message. The best course of action here is to experiment. Maybe you can flex hard enough to make it look like you have a six-pack. Perhaps a close-up of your bicep will make it look like more than a product of three sets of 15 pound weights and masturbation. Selfies are like vain, pathetic snowflakes: there are infinite angles from which they can be taken. Spend an evening photographing every part of your body from every imaginable angle and you are bound to find something attractive eventually.

Bad mouth sororities all your want, but they have taught us a number of valuable lessons. Without them we wouldn't know how easily vodka can be snuck into a sporting event in a water bottle, we would have no concept of humanity's true capacity for cruelty, and we would never have known the full power of the "arm on hip pose." The beloved "triangle of power" allows for a person to a) be photographed from their best side, b) arch their back to make their chest look more ample and c) use their hand to gauge exactly how much their gut is sticking out. Humanity has an amazing ability to create the perfect tools for a moment in history, as was the case with the printing press and the cotton gin. The arm-on-hip pose is the perfect creation for the Internet age, allowing you to maximize the attractiveness of your Facebook picture with minimum effort. Just do your best not to make a duck-face as you are executing this pose. We are on record as saying that it is not cute.