A woman from Akron, Ohio was arrested today for attacking her boyfriend "because he ate all their salsa," Cleveland.com reports.
According to the police report, the trouble started around 5:30 p.m., when Phyllis D. Jefferson, 50, complained to her 61-year-old boyfriend that he had eaten all of their salsa. Love knows no age difference, but it does know when you crossed a line and didn't share any of that delicious snack.
Jefferson then stabbed her boyfriend with a pen and knocked over his TV. The police report is careful to note that the boyfriend reacted and caught the TV, a very important detail.
But this would ultimately be a flaw in his plan to not get stabbed, as Jefferson then attacked him with a kitchen knife. She got in her car and fled the crime scene, and was arrested on Interstate 77—later on, she admitted to detectives that she did in fact stab her boyfriend. It would have been pretty darn difficult to deny, as the man was found holding his stomach and covered in blood outside their apartment.
Jefferson is charged with felonious assault. Let this be a lesson to chips and salsa-loving couples everywhere.