Whenever someone requests everyone's attention on a train, you automatically assume they want something from you. The eye-rolling commences as people hope ignoring the person who interrupted their commute simply fades away. The passengers on this train thought a man was sharing another long, drawn-out tale simply to squeeze money out of them. They were wrong. They were incredibly wrong.

This man wanted everyone's attention, but it wasn't to pester them for money. No, he wanted to troll them by bragging about his numerous victories in life. Let this dude tell it, he can't help but fall up. His stunt-fest reaches its comedic peak when he announces: "I might buy a boat, I'm not sure." As for the cup in his hand, well, it isn't for change. It's because he just finished his latte and refuses to litter. By this point, you're almost waiting for him to reveal that his soap is from Paris.

He ends his social experiment by requesting forms of congratulations from everyone, which range from high-fives to a hug from a bearded man. Gifts from bearded men are like little treasures; it's why people adore Christmas the way they do.

If only every commute were this entertaining.

[via Gawker]