Stupid iPhones. They don't even work!

This demented drunk got so fed up with his iPhone that he thought he'd call 911 about it... five separate times.

Each time he got through, a saintly 911 dispatcher would patiently try to ascertain what exactly the emergency was. And each time, the man would become increasingly, hilariously vexed.

Dispatcher: "Do you need police, or the fire department or an ambulance?"

Man: "No, I just wanna know why the hell this thing's not working."

Reminded that smartphone troubleshooting is nowhere in an emergency dispatcher's training manual, the man offered a few more gems, including: "It ain't my fault, it's fuckin' AT&T's fault." And “My emergency is my fucking phone don’t work!”

We're curious as to what exactly was wrong with the phone? Was he suffering from the infamous battery drain? A jailbreak gone wrong? We may never know. The man's slurred attempts at a diagnosis offer few clues.

As you might expect, he was later arrested. Hear the 911 tapes for yourself below.

[via Gizmodo]