1.
2. inc.
Sounds like: A very unfocused business
Latest album: No World
It's hard to be cutting edge in such an informed world where everyone knows everything and we're all racing to keep up with the trends. Still, the Los Angeles duo of brothers that releases music under the name "inc." manages to do it, both sonically and with the impossibly cool aesthetic they've achieved. Maybe their name is another part of the masterplan and we're just not cool enough to get it. Maybe there really is a deep and important meaning to it. Either way, I have no idea what this name means because I just tried to Google "inc. interview" and got distracted watching a 30-minute interview with Eric Schurenberg, the Editor-in-Chief at Inc. magazine. A wise and inspring gentleman, that Eric.
3. Wampire
Sounds like: Twilight fanfic
Latest album: Curiosity
Although Wampire have yet to release their debut album, Curiosity, they still easily garner a spot on the terrible names docket. It's not that I don't like vampires, actually, I love them! But that meme has just run so ragged in recent years that it's hard to care about anything that even slightly involves it. Which brings us to the "w" that transforms this band name into a Not-A-Vampire band name... a move that just somehow seems worse than even the blood-sucking predator itself. However, recent releases from their first album including the auspiciously scarily titled track "The Hearse" feel more life-affirming than any lo-fi pop that has come out in the past few years -- so overlooking their moniker ends up feeling like an easy task.
4. Potty Mouth
Sounds like: A preschooler's tattle-tale
Latest album: Sun Damage EP
This all girl band follows in the footsteps of riot grrrl focused groups before them, and in the same manner are unafraid to challenge naming-norms and chose Potty Mouth as their label. Maybe including the word "potty" in your band name will become the next band naming craze like using "shark" or "bear" -- or maybe evoking the idea of a swear word through the lens of a child's understanding is actually a really good band name after all. Either way, the debut record from this group is supposedly coming out this year and if it is anything like the EP they released last summer, it will definitely be worth listening to.
5. Pissed Jeans
Sounds like: Sorry for partying
Latest album: Honeys
I guess it makes sense for a band that is self-proclaimedly "noise core" to name themselves something that isn't quite, uh, mainstream friendly like Pissed Jeans. Originally from Pennsylvania, the band have been making records since 2005, but definitely experienced a break-out year this year with their fourth full-length album on Sub Pop entitled Honeys . Please don't let their dirty laundry title detract you from checking this record out -- it is the epitome of noise rock.
6. Com Truise
Sounds like: A technology savvy cruise line
Latest album: In Decay
As far as ideas of what to name your band goes, inverting the letters of a super famous, super crazy movie star has got to be one of the worst ones in the history of the world. However, despite the name, Com Truise aka Seth Haley has been delivering excellent bass-heavy electronica since his debut EP Cyanide Sisters released in 2010. After this initial EP, he signed with Ghostly and put out two full length records -- both which fared far better than Tom Cruise's career. Thankfully with a label like Ghostly repping his stuff, people will look past his name to hear some of the best music involving synthesizers to come out recently.
7. Buke and Gase
Sounds like: Food poisoning
Latest album: General Dome
This band name was originally "Buke and Gass" a play on two rare instruments that the multi-instrumental duo incorporate into their sound. However, after swapping "Gass" for "Gase" to circumvent any misunderstanding about the pronunciation of the instrument, the title feels even more like the results of drinking too much. That hasn't stopped Buke and Gase from breaking out of the Brooklyn music scene as one of the most promising bands of 2013 though -- General Dome sounds like a mix between early Yeah Yeah Yeahs vocal stylings and Bloc Party guitar riffs. Ignore the bodily functions their name evokes and focus on the full-body experience that listening to their music is.
8. Diarrhea Planet
Sounds like: Shit World
Latest album: Loose Jewels
If you are ever thinking about starting anything that you want people to pay money for -- a band, a brand, a company -- don't put the word "diarrhea" in the title. Just don't do it. Resist the urge, ignore your inner 7-year-old boy and avoid associating one of the most dehabiliating, painful and disgusting human experiences with your product! If it's already too late for that somewhat obvious step, and you already named your band Diarrhea Planet, then maybe just make some really chill pop-punk sounding rock that supersedes genres and expectations and will make music critics like your band even if they're usually really grossed-out by bodily functions. Seriously though, the guitar solos, the vocal hooks and the overall aesthetic of this Nashville band is absolutely perfect -- aside from their decision to name themselves after the runs.
9. Snoop Doggy Dogg/Snoop Lion
Sounds like: All Dogs Go To Heaven
Latest album: Doggumentary
If anyone had ever told me that I would one day be getting down to music by a man who straight-faced called himself "Snoop Doggy Dogg" I would've laughed in your face. If you had continued on to tell me that even after he changed his name to Snoop Lion and started making reggae with the same fervor as a born and raised Rastifarian, I'd still like and respect him, I'd continue to chuckle. But, there's something so sincere and suave about Snoop, no matter how many G's he's using, whether he be canine or feline—nothing has held him back from dropping it like it's hot for 20+ years.
10. Foxygen
Sounds like: Punchline to a joke your dad told you
Latest album: We Are the 21st Century Ambassadors of Love and Peace
Foxygen put out an album in 2012 called Take the Kids Off Broadway that I just refused to listen to because of their name. First of all, foxes are one of my favorite animals and it seemed like a rude affront to combine such a noble animal with one of the gases that isn't a noble gas at all but such a common one. Also, essentially this band name is just the addition of one letter to an already existing word which seems kind of silly, like why not just name yourselves "oxygen" instead and look far less like meme-like? Well, thank god for free online streaming, because that was what finally led me to listen to Foxygen's brand new record We Are The 21st Century Ambassadors of Love and Peace, which is a seriously strong modern rock record. Their 2012 record is great too. Thank god that misunderstanding over my love for foxes lies far behind is in the past.
11. The Band
Sounds like: The Concept of Being in a Band
Latest album: Jubilation
Don't get me wrong, I believe that The Band is actually one of the best bands in existence, but it sure takes a strong ego to simply name your band after the concept of a "band" itself. Then again, it's hard to think of a band that does sum up the concept better? Robbie Robertson and Levon Helm went on to solo careers and individual fame, but the rock and funk roots that their group brought into the '60s and '70s was unmatched. Bob Dylan even asked them to be his backing band -- so they were doing something right.
12.
Name: Zac Horne
Age: 28
Where are you from? Lexington, Kentucky
Who are you most excited to see? Too hard to choose!
Rapper you wish would explode and die? Peach and love
Name: Jessica Wetherer
Age: 26
Where are you from? New York
Who are you most excited to see? tUnE-yArDs
Favorite festival: Bonnaroo
