Image via Complex Original
With every new NFL season comes the promise of a clean slate. Sixteen opportunities to prove that this is the year that your team goes all the way to the big game in February. Now, let’s not get it crooked, there isn’t a person outside of Cleveland—maybe not even anyone reasonable in Cleveland—who thinks the Browns are going to be playing in Glendale, Ariz. on the final day of the season. But everyone starts 0-0, everyone's hopes are high, and anything is possible, right?
Anyway, while most fans are content to showing their support for this year's campaign by purchasing team jerseys with their favorite player on the back, others take it to new levels of loyalty, obsessive-fandom, or in some cases, downright stupidity. Tonight, the Packers and the defending Super Bowl champion Seahawks will kick off the 2015 NFL season. And so will begin another year of seeing customized jerseys with head-scratching nicknames, hidden messages, and downright disgusting language every week from now until Super Bowl Sunday. Some are homemade, others are professionally customized, but most are just plain terrible. Get ready for kickoff tonight with this Gallery of The Worst NFL Jersey Fan Fails.
Be the bratwurst to my bun, boo.
Only in Green Bay would this be considered the greatest gesture of love.
But where are your pants, dude?
This gang green fan is so adamant about his passion, that he didn’t even wear pants to the game. Good luck getting inside, pal.
It's always the quiet ones you never expect.
This Falcons fan looks way too reserved to be wearing a customized jersey asking to be spanked. Isn’t this what Matt Ryan says after he throws a touchdown?
This jersey is a virtual chick magnet, right?
You’re so clever, bro. No, we don’t ‘wana.’ #HTTR
Is there a third option?
Someone needs to tell this Niners fan to chill out a little. Surely there’s middle ground between supporting San Francisco and being told to fuck off. Can’t you just see this dude obnoxiously waving that flag after everything positive that happens to his team?
Never drink alone, kids.
We have no doubt that this is one of the more apropos jersey customizations in quite some time. Cool helmet, too.
Neck Beard is most definitely my homie.
In case you forgot, this is a spot on nickname for one-time Broncos starting quarterback Kyle Orton. Going 3-10 in 2010 will make a fan do crazy things.
STUD-MUFFIN FTW!
We’re really hoping this was a gift from his significant other, and not a drunk purchase on the Bengals team shop website.
How old are you?
This is why the Browns are a terrible franchise. They have no creativity on the field or in the stands. ‘Your Mom?’ Really, bro?
At this point, who doesn't feel this way about Roger Goodell?
Remember when Roger Goodell took action on the New Orleans bounty scandal? Well, it looks like ‘Who Dat Nation’ didn’t take too kindly to the commissioner’s ruling. The number just completes the message.
The Jets don't go to Super Bowls
This photo was taken during the Super Bowl XLVI tailgate. You know, the one between the Patriots and the Giants. Somebody tell this dude he wasted a couple hundred bucks to piss off a team that hasn’t won a Super Bowl since 1968.
Something tells me we're busy that day.
Just stop. Please. Only in Pittsburgh would you see this kind of unholy fuckery. Especially since they used Photoshop (poorly) and didn't even buy the real jerseys.
Jay Cutler, not giving a crap since 2006.
Well, that’s one way to go about showing your emotion towards Jay Cutler. Tell us how you really feel.
Well, it's not like anyone would get 'small d*ck' on the back of their jersey.
Don’t you think you’re a little too old—not that this should be acceptable at any age—to be wearing this jersey, sir? Better question: What’s wrong with the folks at the customization shop who processed this order?
Ron Mexico
Damn, bro. We know Michael Vick isn’t exactly taking home the humanitarian of the year award, but at the end of the day, you’re the one wearing this in public.
If the shoe fits...
It’s hard to defend 112 career interceptions in about five complete seasons in the NFL. But dude got paid, right? So who’s really laughing?
Tim Tebow will rise again.
For that one playoff miracle against Pittsburgh, this jersey is acceptable in our eyes. #bringbacktebow
Back-to-back AFC Championship appearances will make a couple do weird things.
Funny how love works, right? She gets the standard Sanchez jersey, while Joe shmo is left with a Dirty 6 shirt. We hope he got a two for one deal at the Jets team store.
Minnesota, the home of creativity and funny hats.
Actually, a brief look at history would prove just the opposite, loyal Vikings fan. Cool hat, though.
Now presiding over Lincoln Financial Field, the honorable...
As in Justice Sonia Sotomayor??? Okay then.
Now we're really confused.
Then why did you buy a Jets jersey? Life is not that hard, people.
It isn't getting any better for Cleveland Browns fans anytime soon.
Well said, sir. About 20 different quarterbacks since 2000 will make you feel this type of way. Don’t worry, it’s only about a month from now before Johnny football inherits an 0-4 team.
That's what you get for putting a head coach and a coordinator on your jersey.
This customization was supposed to be a combination of Mike Nolan and Scott McCloughan, in celebration of their teaming up on the San Francisco sideline in 2007. The team went 5-11 that year.
Mr. and Mrs. Beer Me.
Stay classy, Cincinnati.
We're not sure whether to laugh or cry.
Is this a homemade project? The point is received, Giants fan. The Eagles do have zero Super Bowls at this time.
