The 10 Weirdest Tim And Eric Sketches

Lovers of awkward humor were given reason to pump a triumphant fist in the air when the trailer for Tim And Eric's Billion Dollar Movie made its debut a few months ago. Characteristically NSFW, featuring, among other things, a kinky session with a blow-up doll, Robert Loggia cutting off some old lady's fingers, and a fat woman screaming while two-stepping across some lily pads, the preview couldn't have been unleashed by anyone other than Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim, the comedy duo better known as Tim and Eric.

In the unfortunate event that you aren't among the legion of devotees that struggled with addiction to their campy cult Adult Swim hit, Tim And Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!, it's likely you've caught some other samples of the guys' work, pushing Absolut Vodka with Zach Galifianakis, or directing the trippy, dry hump-tastic video for Major Lazer's "Pon de Floor."

With the guys taking their antics to the big screen this weekend, they're destined to conquer (or creep out) more viewers than ever, and we couldn't be more amped. In celebration of B$M, which hits theaters tonight, we've collected the duo's most bizarre skits, from strange commercials to even stranger sex. Steel yourselves for: The 10 Weirdest Tim And Eric Sketches.

Written by Lauren Otis (@LaurNado)

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Tim Heidecker's favorite former presidential candidate made news with a phenomonally weird ad featuring Cain's Chief of Staff, Mark Block, singing his praises over a cigarette. Between the bad music, the random nicotine fix, and Cain's creepy slow-mo turn towards the camera, it wouldn't have been hard to believe that the video was a Tim and Eric original.

Not one to be outdone by Cain's media team, Heidecker decided to take matters into his own hands. The result? "The Cain Train." Ride it.

This narsty promo for candy-coated horse hair might not make you crave a tail so much as it'll weird you out with its disturbing realness. The commercial, which features several demented-looking girls noshing on syrupy hair with their encouraging mom, seems like one that would blend in seamlessly with a batch on Nickelodeon. (Are you sure these things aren't real?)

That said, as hard as it is to un-see this, a viewing is more than worthwhile just to catch the little dude snacking on his candied dreadlock and spitting fake patois. Bon appétit.

When it comes to unsexy sex, no one does a better job at delivering dry heave after dry heave than Tim and Eric. If you're familiar with the duo's ongoing "Karaoke Legends" series, which features awesomely budget-looking creations not too unlike the videos you might witness playing in the background at your favorite wasted song spot, chances are high that visuals of Ruth Carr have already been burned into your brain.

Primed and ready for action, witness the creatives' unlikely rock star croon wistfully to a daisy dukes-clad neighbor about engaging in some afternoon delight—then get ready to experience the same physical repulsion that occurs when your parents unthinkingly drop the term "making love."

It's a tough call as to whether it's the entourage of tween cheerleaders chanting about poison or their gold leisure suit-sporting leader that has the ability to make us feel something akin to having just pulled an all-nighter, but its tweaky randomness effectively had us convinced after its initial airing that we'd hallucinated the entire thing. Fortunately, we now know better—and so do you.

Good luck getting this jingle out of your head.

An impressive number (and variety) of celebs made special guest appearances on Tim and Eric's loopy sketch comedy series, but Zach Galifianakis' cameos as actor Tairy Greene were easily some of Awesome Show's funniest (and weirdest).

Case in point: This brief snippet, from one of Greene's claim-to-fame gigs on The Snuggler!, a TV show about a dude in booty shorts who spoons ailing victims back to health. We challenge you not to crack up at the hero's awkward run through the woods. If push comes to shove, though, we'll take a hot nurse in real life, thanks.

Zach Galifianakis reunited with Heidecker and Wareheim to create this special promo for Absolut Vodka. The agreement? The trio were commissioned to do whatever they pleased as long as the product was given a shout-out.

To their credit, we can't say we've ever seen another booze commercial quite like this one. In place of blaring techno and fine females, there are spa robes, suggestive sips, and some of the gnarliest wigs ever produced. We imagine the gents' time off-camera not to be a far cry from this.

What's it take to make a woman's bub-bubs bounce? We learn the answer to that in the creative duo's freaky sketch that's somewhat reminiscent of those tales you'd hear of old-school royalty condemning shitty entertainers to death. In this case, however, it's a series of dancing suitors, each more awkward than the last. Whose uncomfortable shuffling will prevail (and save them from being dropped in hot lava)? You'll have to peep the clip to find out.

Another twist? You'll regrettably learn that "bub-bubs" aren't nearly as sexy as they sound.

When it comes to raunch, even Ruth Carr and Yasmine Kittles' flying leaps have nothing on this immensely NSFW cartoon-music video-porno hybrid set to one of Flying Lotus' most danceable tracks (it's so NSFW, in fact, that we had to re-direct you to the site rather than embed it here).

You'll boogie. You'll grimace. You'll probably end up watching it again, then sending it to a few heads to confirm that you just saw what you thought you did. Flashing lights, bright colors, and a slightly cracked-out-looking Dale getting down (in every sense of the word) with a BBW characterize this three-minute, eleven-second experience that's guaranteed to have you swearing someone slipped you a mickey at lunch.