10 Things You Need a "Guy" For When You Live in a City

Just because you played back-up cornerback in high school doesn't mean you know a damn thing about how to build a workout. The human body is a complex machine, and the odds are that you don't know shit about how to care for and maintain it. Rather than making a beeline straight to the bench press every time you enter the gym, talk to someone who knows what the hell they're doing. For the well-heeled among you, that could mean getting hooked up with a personal trainer. For the rest of us, think about those college friends who studied exercise science. If worst comes to worst, man up and ask your most stacked friend how they got those results. Believe it when we say they will be more than happy to tell you...and tell you and tell you until you walk away, and then they'll keep telling whoever's still around.

Back in the day, your mom's friend Sharon cut your hair for a few bucks or some mason jars filled with fruit. Got news for you: in the cold, hard city, there is no mom's friend Sharon. One of the biggest problems with cities is that they offer too many options. All sorts of people are cutting heads, from the Russian dude who only knows how to do a "one" or a "two" to the stylist who charges ladies $200 a head to walk through the door. As soon as you move to a new neighborhood, seek out the right barber or stylist or beautician for you. You can pay as little or as much as you want for a haircut; you just have to figure out exactly what sort of consequences you can live with.

Go ahead and feel proud of yourself for fixing your mom's computer. Just know that "fixing" meant plugging it in and pushing the "on" button. Sometimes, your computer is going to have real problems, and those friendly faces at the Genius Bar aren't so friendly to your credit card. For the modern city dweller, a computer is just as important as a car. In cities like New York, owning a computer is far more important. Few and far between are the jobs that don't require a digital presence. Just like your dad used to ask Phil next door to look at his car before he went to a mechanic, so to must you ask your nerdy friend before you opt to replace that hard drive. You can pay your tech savvy friend back with tips on how to relate to actual human beings outside of online gaming platforms.

As a freelance writer dressing up basically means putting on pants, and that's only if I'm getting on Skype. However, it is important for any man to have a tailor on lock. If you are in a job where a tailored suit can give you a meaningful edge, this is a no-brainer. For those of you who work in a less rarefied space, remember the simple truth that it costs less to fix clothes than to buy new ones. Tailors can fix tears and take in pants after you lose that holiday weight. If the clothes really do make the man, then it pays to know the man who makes the clothes.

It's important to find out how to get your favorite cuisine when you move to a new town. If you are on the coast, seafood is a must. If you are in the South, you'll starting hitting up B-B-Q joints as soon as you park your U-Haul. No matter where you live, there is going to be a pizza emergency every so often. It is important that when it's time for you to order that late night 'za, you aren't hitting up Papa John's. Even in pizza no man's land on the west coast, there are at least a couple good spots to get a pie. Find those places. Treasure those places. Never order Domino's, no matter how many times they apologize for their shitty shitty pizza.

Even if you aren't into sneaker culture, it's important to think about your shoe game. If you eschew a closet full of sneakers for one nice pair of dress shoes, you still need to take care of those dress shoes. The unforgiving terrain of the city means that you'll be switching up shoes more often than your model-waiter roommate switches up bed mates. Learn where to get your shoes heeled and cleaned. It doesn't hurt to talk to a sneakerhead friend to know where to get the best deals either. No matter what your footwear preference, there are people who can help.

Let's be honest. You're not very handy. In a perfect world, you would be able to fix every minor plumbing and carpentry issue that comes your way. It's okay to admit that the only class you struggled with back in high school was woodshop. In a world where the only work you do with your hands is typing, it's okay to look at a tool box and see an unsolvable rubik's cube. Make friends with someone who knows how to fix things. Offer to take a look at their computer, review their contracts, or help them move heavy furniture around their apartment. The next time a pipe bursts or mysterious hole appears in your wall (or you kick a hole in the wall while you're drunk), you'll be glad you know just who to call.

Don't worry, this person will find you. Within the first week in your neighborhood, a man or woman who has lived there since the Second World War will post up next to you and talk your ear off until you beg for mercy. Don't discount this unwelcome sage. They are going to know all the comings and goings in the hood. If you post up on their stoop from time to time, they will tell your who on the block to avoid, what cute girls just moved in a few doors down, and where the best parking can be found. They might even have the inside scoop when a better apartment opens up in the building around the way. Let them talk your ear off about the old country because you will get a few pearls of wisdom in between their diatribes about "kids these days."

Whether you like it black and served from a truck or with all sorts of sugary bullshit in it and served from across a table made from re-purposed wood, your coffee man is one of the most important people in your life. Don't settle for a Starbucks barista who makes your lattes a little too foamy. Don't deal with a roadside java slinger that can't even force a smile. Odds are you'll be seeing this person more often than your girlfriend, so make sure you find joy in your preferred coffee dispensing scenario.

Most people who move to the city are met with a series of closed doors and long lines. It is in your best interest to seek out a guy who can make those doors open and those lines disappear. Of course, an attractive female friend is ideal for these situations, but there are some men out there who can talk their way past the velvet rope. These are men you need to know. Even the most night-life averse person has a night where they need to get into the club. Know the man who knows how to get it done, even if he is a bit of a douche.