Honesty doesn't make for good TV. Getting busted for the opposite, however, is highly watchable. On an episode of her daytime talk show last week, Ellen DeGeneres decided to celebrate 14 years on the air by inviting audience members to personally select a single item from the gift shop to mark their visit. The catch? There was a hidden camera keeping an eye on prospective overindulgers the entire time.

"When I started this show 14 years ago, I said this is going to be like a relationship," DeGeneres told the audience before playing back some of the compelling hidden camera footage. "And the most important thing, the foundation of a good relationship, is—say it with me—separate thermostats. And then after that, trust. Right? Trust is very important."

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After boring the crowd to tears with examples of honest audience members, DeGeneres finally introduced us all to Nancy. "My sister couldn't come, so that was her souvenir," Nancy said after the (very mildly) incriminating footage was shown to all of America.

"You're the kind of person, like, when you go trick-or-treating and nobody's home, you take the bowl," DeGeneres joked, noting that many other audience members' sisters couldn't be in attendance. To ensure we all learned a lesson about honesty or integrity or whatever, DeGeneres then sent Nancy to the so-called "Ellen jail."

For further education on this extremely important and often overlooked topic, please see the notorious case of Christian Slater overindulging on pricey caviar at a fictional house party: