Kurt Cobain's Childhood Home is For Sale, R. Kelly Shares his Grocery List

I've been studying Rihanna on Instagram for the past two years and I'm 99% certain that she has someone in her crew that's hired only to take pictures of her. She hits us with photos of herself from 20 different angles daily, that's just not something you can do easily on your own (trust me, I've tried). You need someone who's there day in and day out, committed to capturing you at every flattering position. And while most of the time whoever Rihanna hired does a great job of this, last weekend they really dropped the ball because Rihanna was forced to take a selfie. A SELFIE. And not just any selfie, one with a slow loris, an endangered monkey in Thailand. Thai authorities caught wind of the incident, found the people who own the animal and arrested them. Now I don't want to point fingers here, but dammit Rihanna's Instagram photographer where were you?! If you were doing your job, then maybe you would've talked Rihanna out of posing with an endangered species and these people wouldn't be facing four years in jail. Then again, I imagine it'd be pretty hard to talk Princess RiRi out of doing anything she wanted.

(Vulture)

When you idolize someone the way fans do with Kurt Cobain, every little momento from their life is a big deal. I mean, someone actually paid $18.50 for dirt that Kurt might have (but almost definitely did not) slept on when he lived under a bridge in Washington. So you can imagine what buzz erupted when Kurt's mother, Wendy O'Connor, announced that she is putting Kurt's childhood home up for sale.

While the family is looking for a potential buyer, they also hope that they find a sponsor to turn the home into a museum. So how much are they asking? According to Fact, the Aberdeen, Washington home, which Kurt lived in between the ages of two and nine, as well as again in his teens, was last valued at $67,000 but has since risen to $500,000. Hold up. $500,000?! Mom, Dad if you're reading: PROTECT THE HOUSE. I will find a way to get famous. Do you hear me? Protect. The. House.

It's not uncommon for costume stores to capitalize on whatever big cultural happening occurred that year. One of the bigger events of 2013 was the long-awaited return of Daft Punk, who essentially dominated every summer playlist with "Get Lucky." So it makes sense that Party City would try and turn that into one of their main costumes for the upcoming Halloween season. But what doesn't make any fucking sense, is the actual costume they've created. Honestly, if this kid wasn't at a DJ table, I would have no clue who he was trying to be. I mean I would've put more money on a cannonball shooter or this dude from the Looney Tunes:

But then again who am I to say anything? For three years in a row I was too lazy to pick a costume that I put a white dress shirt on, wore one of my dad's ties, carried a notepad around and called myself a "journalist." SMDH Katie! Like you could not have dug yourself any deeper into the nerd world if you tried. So do you kid; we all have our embarrassing childhood moments (or years, in my case).

(CoS)

If you know even the slightest bit about Flaming Lips, you know frontman Wayne Coyne is a weird dude. It's part of his brilliance, but it also creates a few issues. The most recent incident involves Coyne's Instagram account. Apparently the singer was posting a shit ton of nudity (shocker!) and as a result, the app deleted his account. But don't worry, if you're in desperate need of Coyne's photos he's already started a new account and (shocker!) it's already full of nudity. If that's not enough and you're just really, really mad at Instagram for this, you can sign the petition Flaming Lips fans have started, in an attempt to get back the photos the app deleted when they closed Coyne's account.

The takeaway from this whole story? Petitions are soooo hott this year.

(Stereogum)

If you've found yourself wondering "what goes through the mind of someone like R. Kelly," you're not alone. If you've specifically found yourself wondering, "What goes through the mind of someone like R. Kelly when he's grocery shopping," don't worry—again, you're not alone. Because when the singer had a guest over to his house recently, someone was so fascinated by R. Kelly's grocery list that they took a picture of it (wouldn't we all!) and sent it to Vulture to share with the Internet. So what must-haves are on Kels list? Let's take a look.

- Dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets: True. These are an essential. Personally I don't know how anyone fucks with any other kind of chicken nuggets.

- Bologna: Only the greatest sandwich meat there is for those aged 3-6! And also for R. Kelly.

- Sugar cookie dough: Good thinking, it's almost Christmas time! Finding sugar cookie dough is going to be a nightmare soon, better to stock up.

- Lunchables: There are not many things I admire more than someone who not only eats Lunchables in their adult years, but unabashedly eats Lunchables in their adult years. Play on.

- Red apples, bananas, oranges: Yawn. Boring. Bored. More Lunchables please.

- Go-Gurts: NOW WE'RE TALKING. This is an item I can really get behind. Kels is a busy man but he's also healthy and likes delicious treats. I respect that he's not letting his dedication to eating healthy get in the way of doing business. Nailed it, R. Kelly. Nailed it.

Jigsaw puzzles are the worst. You spend hours, days even weeks sometimes trying to put together these pictures and then at the end of it you're done and it's like, "Well WTF, now what?" Because after you're done putting the puzzle together, it doesn't suddenly turn into an xbox or an action figure that you can continue to play with. It just is a picture of something. Are you guys asleep yet? Because I am.

But for some reason, the usually eccentric Thom Yorke and his Atoms For Peace have decided to sell a 192-piece puzzle of their artwork. For $105 dollars. Why? Nobdy knows. Literally nobody. But at least they realize the ridiculousness behind this, stating the piece of merchandise is "possibly the most expensive time wasting device you will see all year." Eh, not so sure about that guys. I mean, have we all forgotten about THIS?

(LOBF)

"Um, I didn't buy you that sandwich," Drake's mom says. It's a simple enough phrase, a casual mistake that happens when circumstances arise like long lines and crowded deli counters. But to Drake? No, to Drake that line was the beginning of the end. It was, perhaps, in that very moment that Drake realized things didn't always go his way. People weren't going to care about his likes and his wants and his needs. Loved ones, even someone like your mother, were bound to let you down, lie to you and disappoint you. So sure, to his mom that was just "a tuna sandwich," but for Drake that would become the metaphor for all his future relationships.

Nothing Was The Same, indeed.

(CoS)

If you asked me what my favorite album was between the ages of 11-13, the answer would always be Ja Rule's Venni Vetti Vecci. But a very close second or third would be whatever Kidz Bop album was out at the time. I'm a sucker for best hits collections of any kind. I honestly am probably 1 of 4 people who have Celine Dion's Best Christmas Hits CD. So I have a very high appreciation for something like this Indie Kidz Songs album. I know, I know it's fake, yes I'm aware but still that doesn't take away how clever and well-done this is. I don't think this would come as a surprise to anyone, but I'd legitimately purchase this. A+!

Andrew W.K.'s twitter is, if nothing else, inspirational. When you're down, he constantly hits you with advice and guidance like "PARTY TIP: Weed after work" or "PARTY TIP: In case you weren't aware, boobytrap spelled backwards is partyboob." Man, I feel better already just hearing this! So it makes complete sense that Simon & Schuster would give him his own book deal so he could share these nuggets of wisdom. Not only that, but it's titled The Party Bible. No, really.

According to his publisher, Michael Szczerban, The Party Bible is "an unforgettable voyage in search of truth, wisdom, and party bliss... every feeling will be permitted, every thought will become prophecy, and humanity’s surging life force will be harnessed and ridden into the abyss." Whoa, my life force will be harnessed and ridden into the abyss? Sign me up. And just in case you have any further questions, Andrew's made a super helpful promo video (thanks Andrew!) to help give an idea of just he went through to deliver us this Holy Grail of party tips. And it's perfect. No word on when this will come out, but if it's anywhere near May 27, it would make a great birthday gift for me.

(P4k)