Where to begin with this reality TV star, footballer's ex-wife and BRIT award-winning Girls Aloud singer? The fact that she collaborated with Will.i.am on her chart topping solo 3 Words? Or that she has a tramp stamp and saucy leg tattoo? Or how about the fact that she was once charged with racially aggravated assault (later lessened to just aggravated assault) alleging that she punched a bathroom attendant while calling her a "Caribbean jigaboo"? (ed: WHAT??!!) Whatever the case, let's end with the fact that she divorced her Chelsea left-back husband Ashley Cole for leaving no less than five other women on their backs. Yeeeeah, banana kick.