Taboo’s pretty much incapable of stringing together metaphors and similes without the help of popular children’s entertainment.

To be fair, no one expects Taboo to construct prose on the level of Jonathan Franzen. Far too frequently, though, the writing in Fallin’ Up reads like the musings of a kindergartener. Looking back on his relationship with his grandmother, he writes, “I was the boy Max in Where the Wild Things Are, and Nanny was the friendliest ‘wild thing.’” As a teenager, he was “Rosemead High School’s equivalent to Mumbles out of Happy Feet.” Reflecting upon the emotions surrounding BEP’s signing to Interscope Records in 1997: “That check in my hand was the beans held in Jack’s palm in the fairy tale Jack and the Beanstalk.” And so on. We’ll save the multiple Charlie and the Cholocate Factory references for your own reading pleasure.