Nebraska Dad Accidentally Eats 4 Pot Brownies, Purposely Insults Family Cat

People really need to start keeping better track of their pot brownies or else teachers and dads alike will keep accidentally eating them. One unlucky dad in Nebraska found pot brownies his kids left in the backseat of the car and ate four, resulting in a call to the police, crawling on the floor, and calling the family cat a "bitch."

The Omaha resident was only identified as a 53-year-old man, the Omaha World-Heraldreported. He found the brownies while unloading groceries from a car his adult kids used earlier that day according to Omaha Police. Police were called at about 9:45 p.m. Tuesday after the man started getting "bad anxiety," as his wife told police. She tried to find out what was in the brownies, but her children didn't answer her phone calls. The Cool Mom didn't give police her kids names out of fear they'd get in trouble.

The same could not be said of one of the couple's children, who arrived at the house while police were there and told them the brownies were his siblings'. The narc child told police he was "pretty sure it was just marijuana in the brownies." Pretty sure you're a snitch, bruh, though not as big a snitch as the 18-year-old who not only said First Daughter of the United States Malia Obama was smoking weed at Lollapalooza, but said she had photos to prove it.

When paramedics arrived at the family's house, the man told them he was "trippin." Paramedics confirmed that much after checking his vital signs, which were normal, saying the man was crawling and randomly cursing. He reportedly refused to be taken to the hospital when paramedics offered.

An Omaha Police spokesman said the investigation into the case was over.