Rob Schneider has fashioned his career with the single-minded mission to offend every race and culture with one cartoonish, caricatured performance after the next. He's taken his one-fourth Filipino heritage and run with that to play everything under the sun, so the hardest part was deciding just which role we had the biggest issue with.

Ultimately we settled on Salim, the Middle Eastern cab driver and would-be terrorist from the annual Adam Sandler turd of '08 You Don't Mess With the Zohan. Around the time that Salim dialed "1-800-Hezbollah" it became clear that Sandler and Schneider's co-enabler act needed to be stopped once and for all. Four years later and we're still waiting.