I love to cook. I love dreaming up recipes, shopping for ingredients, prepping and cooking all the food, then creating a masterpiece of a presentation and taste.
It’s one of my favorite things to do.
But that doesn’t mean I don’t like when someone cooks for me; oh no, I love that. I always dreamed of being with a man who could whip me up a meal.
So naturally I’m dating a guy who doesn’t even know how to scramble an egg. What’s worse? Before we met, he had never even eaten eggs.
Of all the guys in New York City, I find the one who knows his way around a stove about as well as he can navigate a Sephora.
To all you single guys—and even those already snatched up (it’s never too late)—these are the 12 skills you must learn.
MAKE EGGS THREE WAYS
While it’d be nice for you to cook a gourmet meal at home, start with the basics. Eggs are one of the most simple and versatile foods. You should learn how to make them scrambled, over easy, and in an omelet. (We’ll save baked and poached for the Level II class.) Have your mom, sister, friend, or neighbor show you. If you’re too embarrassed to ask—and maybe you should be—there are instructional videos on YouTube.
While you’re in the kitchen, have them show you how to boil water and make pasta, too.
BREW A CUP OF COFFEE
If your woman drinks coffee in the morning, please pay attention to how she takes it. Have the right brand and flavor of sugar or milk at the ready before she stays over. Nailing those details will win her.
OPEN A BOTTLE OF WINE OR CHAMPAGNE
If you fumble with a corkscrew, she will wonder what else you will fumble. Again, there are instructional YouTube videos for this. Practice! Then when she comes over, offer her a drink.
Make sure to have a stocked bar so she has options. Have some vodka in the freezer, beer in the fridge, and wine on the rack.
GET A BARTENDER’S ATTENTION
Stand where the bartender can see you and don’t be scared to politely nuzzle between people. Have your cash or card in hand where the bartender can see it, and look him/her right in the eye. Don’t wave your hands, just maintain eye contact, and if necessary say, “Excuse me.” Don’t call anything else out; you’re not at a frat party. Then tip well, so they come to you for the second round.
SCHMOOZE/BE A GOOD DATE AT AN EVENT
Smile and say hello to everyone you’re introduced to and shake their hand firmly. Keep eye contact and pay attention to the conversation so you can possibly contribute something interesting. Don’t take over or talk over anyone. Make sure your date always has a full drink and is comfortable. (Unless she's borderline drunk—then it's time to stop refilling the glass.) It’s also important to show affection—handholding and a quick kiss, totally okay—but save the more intimate stuff for the afterparty.
TIE A TIE
I like tying a guy’s tie for him. There is something really sexy about it. But you should know how to at least tie a basic knot on your own.
Make it a point to get to the door before your lady and stand behind it as you pull it open. Don’t make her squeeze by you. For a car door, make sure she is comfortably sitting in the seat before you close it.
CHANGE A LIGHTBULB
A man who is handy around the house is a hot man. Make sure you also know how to fix a running toilet, and use a level and power drill. It also wouldn’t hurt for you to be able to sync remote controls to a television, and understand how basic appliances work.
Borrow your friend or parent’s car and learn. You never want to ask her to get out and guide you into the spot. A woman equates so much of what you do in day-to-day life with how you'll be in bed—driving is one of those things. Practice 'til you've achieved smoothness behind the wheel. This goes for dancing and massage-giving, too. Add them to the list.
CONSOLE A WOMAN
Put your arm around her or hold her hand, then tell her it’s going to be okay. Ask how you can help. Now is not the time to offer constructive criticism or how you think she could have behaved differently. Sit and listen; a woman just wants to be heard.
HOLD A BABY
The most important thing is confidence. A baby will read your nervousness and freak out, so make sure to stay calm. Hold the baby close and keep the head supported. Don’t be scared to hum or sing a little tune; a woman loves this.
WRITE A LOVE LETTER
When you have a captive and willing audience, there is no sweeter way to express your feelings. Use lines from a poem or song if you must, but it’s better to be creative and original. Make her laugh.
Luckily the guy I’m dating is an all-star at this; he writes me a love letter every single day.
I guess this makes up for not knowing how to make me eggs. Which is fine, I said I like to cook – but guess who’s doing the dishes.
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