Son of: Pierce Brosnan
In a bout of very un-Bond-like behavior, Pierce’s adopted son was arrested at a London nightclub on suspicion of possessing stolen cell phones. (Really?) After a subsequent arrest for heroin possession, his 007 dad publicly cut him off and disowned him.

Though we can’t quite wrap our heads around which portion of this chain of events made him feel like enough of a catch to opt onto a reality dating show shortly after, we’re fairly certain that the resulting Octopussy was scarce.