Yesterday, it came to light (AKA, the Internet found out) that Tufts University is now taking a very different approach to trying to appeal to the interests of kids today: A new essay prompt presented to students applying to the school is not only inspired by, but actually based on a Drake song. Seriously. It's based on "The Motto," and they ACTUALLY USE A HASHTAG IN THE PROMPT. Look:
E) The ancient Romans started it when they coined the phrase "Carpe diem." Jonathan Larson proclaimed "No day but today!" and most recently, Drake explained You Only Live Once (YOLO). Have you ever seized the day? Lived like there was no tomorrow? Or perhaps you plan to shout YOLO while jumping into something in the future. What does #YOLO mean to you?
Naturally, they ended up sounding more like an out-of-touch parent than one of the cool kids, because using #YOLO in any form went out of style, like, last year. #YOLO is dead, everyone—it lived once, then the Internet and Zac Efron killed it, and it is now no more. Please stop.
That said, in the service of next year's applications (or right now, whenever), we took the liberty of coming up with a few other Drake-inspired essay prompts for Tufts. Complex Academic Consultants has your back.
Please proceed with your education, and even more, your future in mind:
- What has the experience of your shower taught you?
- Discuss a time you felt shame within the context of a complicated romantic relationship (perhaps one in which you were paying video models to fly across the country with you).
- Life is not what happens to you, but how you react to it. To that end, please discuss a particularly memorable instance when you HYFR in the face of adversity.
- Explain your personal "motto."
- Where is 'here'?
- Money, cars, hoes, clothes: What does being "successful" mean to you, and what will you go on to do with your very valuable college degree? Furthermore, if you are limited to those four choices, please explain which acquisitional experience will be the most valuable to you and those around you, and why.
- Are you drunk right now? Did you go out tonight?
- Is it possible to have enough friends? What is the value of old friends as opposed to new ones?
- Have you ever had a hero become a rival that you had to A.I. for your own survival?
- Does expressing emotions make you a pussy in the context of contemporary American masculinity? Explain.
- Talk about a time when you were scared to let someone in and get to know the "real" you.
- Who did you make your ex-girlfriend?
- The man who is the object of your cuckolding is sitting across from you at a club. You are on an unlimited budget. Do you handle this situation by sending something over, or not? What do you send over? Do you send a note with it? If so, what does the note say? [Please note: There is no "wrong" answer to this prompt. But there is a "right" one.]
To name a few. We could do this all day. Hit us up, Tufts!
RELATED: The 50 Best Drake Songs
[via The Hairpin]