There are some things that white people are great at: BMX sports, buying hybrid cars, recycling, putting their kids in time-out, inventing history, and appropriating black culture for profit.
For the dozens of things white people are great at, there are an equal number of things they are not great at. For instance: white people are not known for being very funky. Many attempts at PDF (Public Display of Funkiness) are very embarrassing for white people, as those close by will point and laugh and capture the horrific scene on camera to be used later in the r/whitepeoplegifs subreddit. Like everything else, this isn't white people's fault. They aren't born devoid of funk. It's just that most white people don't get the opportunity to flex their funk muscles growing up, so they (the funk muscles) wither away from atrophy. Again, realize we said "most."
White people with funk exist, but are essentially black rhinoceroses, rare and critically endangered. We've scoured the "White People in Music" canon and picked out the Caucasoids with the most soul. We've weeded out the classic rockers that are more "bluesy" than funky, the faux Neo Soul singers, and rappers who were simply faking the funk to come up with The 25 Funkiest White Boys in Music History.
Written by Justin Roberson (@BauceSauce)
RELATED: 20 Great Rap Songs Ruined by White People
RELATED: The 20 Best Terrible Rap Verses
RELATED: 40 Rap Lyrics That Make No Sense