Hot dogs. Michael Bay. Double quarter-pounders with cheese (make that a Super Size Combo, actually, thanks). Football. Apple pie. Oh, and Biggie Smalls and Lynyrd Skynyrd and Hulk Hogan and Stan Bush and Detroit Muscle and a squadron of F-16s flying over a parade at the Pickle Festival in a small town in Kentucky and AMERICA FUCK YEAH. These colors never run, just like our $#!$@! red-ringed Xbox360. We Americans expect big things from our video games, and only a few fully sate our voracious appetite for patriotic shit: Explosions, steroids, Minute Men (II), big guns, fast cars, condiments, and the like. And yeah, these games have got it all. We