In case you haven't heard, this week marks one of the greatest television events of our time: it's motherfucking Shark Week. The annual TV series kicked off on Sunday with an underwhelming swim-off between Olympic gold medalist Michael Phelps and a great white shark. Phelps lost decidedly, but the reason for the general disappointment across social media was the fact that Phelps raced against a CGI simulation of the shark, and not the real deal.
While Phelps was over there racing against imaginary sharks, the GoPro YouTube account uploaded footage of a real-life great white shark encounter, and it's insane. In the video, a man named Johan Potgieter is spearfishing off the coast of South Africa. All is right and blue and relatively calm at first, but about 30 seconds in, a great white comes out of Potgieter's left view, scaring the shit out of him. You can actually hear him scream underwater. The shark swims a few feet away, then comes racing back at Potgieter, prompting him to scream again. The shark ends up veering to the right and darting away, leaving the diver with a feces-filled wetsuit (okay, not really, but if it were true, no one could blame him).
Potgieter immediately hightails it and swims to the surface. Suspenseful music plays, leaving you wondering if he's going to make it out alive. After what seems like an eternity, Potgieter pops up above the water, screaming, "White, white!" The camera pans down into the ocean again for another shot at the shark, swimming just beneath his feet. He makes his way back to an awaiting boat with companions, telling them, "It was right next to me—did you see it almost ate me?"
We saw, man. We saw.