Tracy Morgan said it best, “Hoes be winning.” For today’s groupie, a meal ticket is so 2005. Groupies today are all about "that life," and the fastest way to that life is found with any athlete or entertainer within digging reach. The lifestyle these men lead allows them to think “It ain’t tricking if you got it,” and boy…they are out here tricking. And shamefully, some of these guys are simpin’ too. Whether these men are trickin’ or simpin’, if a groupie has that “good good” then her life is great.
Football season is here, and the NBA lockout is a reality. Don’t underestimate the groupie, they know what's up. To the groupie, the NBA lockout is the equivalent of the 2008 stock market crash. The groupies need the NFL more than the fans need the NFL. This upcoming NFL season, the groupie wants to “just do it” and these NFL players “hear the footsteps” of fake red bottom heels coming.
As part of Complex.com's week-long NFL Preview, we surveyed several NFL players to get a glimpse into just what the groupie scene is like these days. We offered them anonymity in exchange for their candor. Here’s what they had to say.
1. How big of a problem are groupies?
"You really have to protect yourself. Now, not every baby mama is a groupie, but you see a lot of women seeking the benefits of NFL players. I try to be fair that women are naturally attracted to successful men and that [includes] athletes. But now with groupies, it’s a bigger beast." - An NFC South Pro Bowler
"A big problem because a lot of guys that never really had ‘em before have ‘em now, and they don’t now how to act with the new attention. Groupies are really bad because they destroy homes. A lot of these players are married with children. These groupies don’t give a fuck at all about a man being married. They just care about themselves and what they can get out the situation." - A free agent safety
"Not a problem unless you let them be a problem." - One of the best defensive tackles in the game
2. What city has the most?
"New York, L.A., Miami, Houston, Vegas and wherever the big events are." - A cornerback for a team on the East Coast
"Miami, L.A. and Phoenix." - An East Coast Pro Bowler
"Dallas, Houston…especially Atlanta, and Jacksonville has them too. The women in Puerto Rico and Brazil are easy but they really could care less that you play in the NFL. They just know that you’re from out of town and want to show you a good time." - A free agent safety
3. What city has the least?
"I don’t know. They are everywhere really. If I had to pick a city, I’d say Buffalo." - NFC East Pro Bowler
"Any city without a pro team." - An NFC South Pro Bowler
4. What city has the hottest groupies?
"Houston, L.A. and Miami." - An NFC South Linebacker
"You can never go wrong with Atlanta, and Miami would be a close second." - State of Florida lineman
"Phoenix for sure." - A current Pro Bowler and Super Bowl champion
5. What city has the ugliest groupies?
"Since they are small towns, Buffalo or Green Bay. They may have some diamonds in the rough though." - AFC East rookie
RELATED: The 10 Famed Sexy Groupies of Rock
6. What's the age of the oldest groupie that's approached you?
"About 40." - NFC South cornerback
"48." - East Coast offensive tackle
"She looked 50, but I don’t know." - AFC North rookie
7. What's the age of the youngest groupie that's approached you?
"The youngest that they can get in the club." - NFC defensive back
"I hope she was 18. She kept asking for my number, and I sad cut it out!" - Rookie, 2nd round pick
"High school age, it was crazy. I ran from that girl." - NFC South linebacker
8. Of the groupies that you've seen, what race are most of them?
"Black, but that’s just the environments I’m in. I hear other teammates talk about white girls and Latino girls being just as bad." - An anonymous #57
9. What's the most money you've spent on a groupie at one time?
"None…they’re groupies. You don’t have to spend money on ‘em." - Free agent free safety
"This girl wasn’t a groupie, but a chick I was dating. Me and her went to hang out and it was $500 times 2 for travel, $300 for food, throw away money about $200, hotel about $800 and that’s $2300 for a three-day weekend. Now imagine if you have a groupie, and y’all are staying in the Fontainebleau in Miami and hitting clubs and buying tables. You can easily spend $5K without blinking." - NFC offensive guard
10. What hotels are the easiest to sneak them in on the road?
"Any hotel, you just have to do it right. The floor that the players are on has security, so a lot of times players just get a room in the same hotel on a regular floor." - Former NFC East safety
11. How do they get in contact with you?
"Social media mostly. They also give you the groupie stare at the club too. Just stare at yo’ ass until you speak to them. Be hypnotizing guys [laughs]." - NFL Pro Bowl lineman
"They just stare at us when we’re in the club. Like deliberately. It’s like you’re going to the dog pound, and they’re just waiting to get chosen. They will literally stare at you in VIP until you ask them if they want to come to VIP." - An anonymous #24
"Mainly in the clubs. Anytime there is a big event like a Super Bowl or All-Star weekend, they are around. They make sure to get your attention by the way they dress or they’ll approach you. I’ve had girls slip their number in my pocket before. When they come up to me, they’ll say they're your biggest fan or 'I can tell you play football by the way you’re built.'" - Former NFC East safety
"You’ll see them digging you just by eye contact, and most guys go after those girls. A woman can’t make a man want her. A groupie is just an easy opportunity. They just be thirsty. Then you have the ones who play like they don’t know who you are. They know the rosters and they do their homework. Heck, she’s not bright if she hasn’t done her homework." - An anonymous #96
"I’ve had a waitress see that I’m big by my size. Once she took my credit card for the meal, she remembered my name or wrote it down or whatever and gave me my receipt. Within five minutes of leaving the restaurant, I get hit up on Twitter, and it’s her with a nude twitpic talking bout 'This is what I look like fresh out the shower after work.'" - An anonymous #75
12. What's the craziest groupie story that's happened to you?
"In L.A. this chick domed me and my partners up. We left the room and our other homeboy went in to go fuck. We hear her moaning in the room, we’re laughing. And then all of a sudden we hear this weird noise. We thought she was choking him. We ran into the room to see what was going on, and it turns out that when he busted his nut, he threw up on her at the same time. Shit was hilarious and disgusting." - NFL Pro Bowl tackle
"A girl was waiting outside my house. I wasn’t answering her calls or texts. Then all of a sudden she just started knocking on my door. I called the cops. [Laughs.] She knew I was inside, but I never came to the door because I had company. The police were calling her name outside and everything, talking about '[Player's name] called us and told us you were making a disturbance.' And then she’s like, 'Oh, so HE IS HOME!' really loud. It was funny." - Pro Bowl defensive lineman
"I was at a DC club with a couple well-known guys. We’re at the table chilling, and two girls walk up to us. One of them was playing shy, and the other just came right out and said whoever gets up first is coming home with me tonight. No one got up, we just looked at her and busted out laughing." - NFL Free Agent defensive back
"I met a girl on Twitter from Texas. She hit me up and asked me to mentor some kids. I told her I don’t live in Texas but I’ll do it in the offseason, which was around the corner. We exchange numbers, and I get a picture from her the next day. She says it was an accident and she meant to send it to her brother. It was a regular pic, I told her she looked nice. I was just being cordial, no flirting or nothing. We’re just talking casually, and then she hits me the next day and says, 'If you liked yesterday’s pic, you’re going to love this one'…she was ass naked! All of a sudden, she wants to come to the city I play in and visit me, etc. I’m not biting though.
"We continued to talk for about two weeks and shit's just not adding up. I looked at the people she followed and I swear everyone was in the NFL or NBA. I asked her if any of the guys ever helped her with her charity, and she said they all try to holla at her. I asked her why she still follows them then, and she said she loves sports and is a tomboy.
"I remember hearing about a little scam some groupies had going on, so I asked her to send me a pic, which she did. I sent her one back holding my cup and making a funny face. I asked her to send me a picture mocking the pose I just sent her. Guess what? She said her camera was broke. [Laughs.] I stopped talking to her.
"Maybe two weeks later, I’m talking to my teammate and he describes the exact same situation. I told him to let me see the pics, and the same girl sent him all the same pics she sent me. It didn’t make any sense, because what if I had flown her to my city? What was her explanation going to be for not looking the same in the pictures she sent me? Maybe she wanted to ask me for money and thought I’d give it to her, I don’t know. That’s the craziest thing that’s happened to me though as far as groupies go." - Pro Bowl NFC offensive lineman
13. What's the craziest groupie story you've heard about?
"We meet this one chick and chop it up with her in the lobby. She says she’s down to suck us all up. Me and my homeboy stay down in the lobby at the bar and my other friend goes up to the room with the girl. We get up there about 15 minutes later, and the girl is crying. My friend is cussing her out bad calling her all types of hoes. She sucked him up, but I have no idea why she was crying. My homeboy that was with me at the bar went up to her and was trying to get a blowjob and she said she didn’t want to do it. She put her hands back in her face. His dick was already out so he’s standing next to her and all of a sudden bust on her shoulder. She raises up and was like 'Are you serious?' and just lost it and started laughing actually. It was pretty funny." - Pro Bowl right tackle
"We were at the club one night. We had a table and there was a group of girls next to us at another table. There were about ten of them. Well my homeboy got to chopping it up and he fucked all 10 of them in one night. I have no clue how he did it." - #29 who shall remain nameless
One NFC South defender went on an interesting tangent…
"To be honest, I don’t believe in groupies. All women that look for a great opportunity, I believe that’s what a smart girl would do. As a successful man, you’re at the top of the food chain. From athletes, entertainers, Fortune 500 CEOs, surgeons, and all other successful men your money, power and status puts them at the top of the food chain. What women is not going to want to be with you?"
So they're taking him for his status rather than his character?
"Yes. The attraction is more powerful than his character. They let you get away with a lot more when you have status. Some guys like easy access to a chick. They don’t want to have to work for a good girl. They want a chick on the side, you know, a show piece. The mentality is, well I got the money, I got the cars, I got the house, I GOTTA have the girl. Most successful men have the highest divorce rate. Did you know the NFL divorce rate after two years after retirement is 80%. Once the money doesn’t flow like it used to and the attention is gone, they bounce. The chick you with wasn't with you for the right reasons. And she never had to really learn to love with you or live with you. An NFL player is always gone. Practice, games, charity events, you’re never there. You don’t have to be around someone 24/7, but after you retire, it changes. Once the stadium’s gone, the fame is gone....where’s my backbone? She gone!"
So if you don’t believe in groupies what would you call the women you just described?
"An opportunist in love with opportunity and not in love with the guy. It’s very rare to find a good chick. You’re not going to find them in the clubs. It has to be something that just happens. A lot of times dudes know these girls are up to no good, but they don’t want to pay attention to signs. Some of these dudes be falling in love with these girls, it’s crazy. But men are the same way. We want a chick we can brag about too. She wants to tell her friends my man is a millionaire, he does this or that. We want the same. You don’t want to tell your friends and family your girl works at Walmart or is the 7/11 clerk. With these women, you just have to be true to yourself."
Finally, a Pro Bowler’s parting words of wisdom:
"These groupies are a young man’s dream and a young man’s worst nightmare. You got money in your pockets for the first time. You’re getting $60k checks a week, and the finest women are at your feet willing to do anything you tell them. It’s so easy, but you just have to make sure you meet the right one and not meet the wrong one with wrong intentions."