I just wrote 600 words of ammunition, loaded up my hater cannon and took aim toward the bastion of mediocrity that is the latest black installment of the Riccardo Tisci x Nike collaboration. But after reading it back, I glanced again through the like-a-lookbook-but-not-really-a-lookbook-so-maybe-press-shots-idk (?) and hesitantly disengaged. I guess that kind of sums up the collabo for me. Do I like it? It’s "decent." I do know for certain now that I don't hate it, at least.

Let's shift focus specifically to the mids for a second: I'd couple them with a pair of black skinnies and an oversized white tee and maybe even a fishtail, and I'm sure I'd look nothing short of pretty fuckin' handsome. A lot of attention has been paid to the finer detailing, as evidenced by the healthily apportioned fibers of color on the tongue and band. They lay a tasteful, subtle contrast to the otherwise smokey black body. As stated a dozen times back when the whites dropped in April, the materials are really something when compared with your everyday vanilla Nikes. It's definitely the kind of leather you'd expect from a $200 sneaker.

But wait, what the fuck? That paragraph sounds like it was plucked fresh from the tongue of somebody who loves the mids? You're right, but I don't. Fuck man, this shit is difficult to explain.

Listen, when I peeped those Y-3 Qasas for the first time, I got sweaty. I Googled them when I was bored and I stayed up late for the drop. When they finally arrived, I couldn't bring myself to wear them outside. I took the financially ambiguous decision to acquire a second pair from eBay just so I could play in the yard with the other neighborhood ninjas. If that's not sneaker love, my dudes, I don't know what is. And the Tisci Nikes don't affect my perspiration levels quite the same way.

Why am I being so fucking critical? Maybe it's the fact that Riccardo Tisci is, well, Riccardo goddamn Tisci. His name is synonymous with the dark and controversial graphics we all expect from a Givenchy collection. When this collaboration was announced, we all expected something dark and controversial—something Givenchy-ish. And we didn't get it. So, here we are, unsure of how exactly to feel. Is that Tisci's fault? No. This is not a Givenchy collaboration, and a true designer doesn't channel creativity with the consumer's expectations at the forefront of his or her mind. Of course, that doesn't excuse the stupid fucking boots though, dawgie.

I guess all this was building to letting you know that you can cop cop that murdered out new new Nike + R.T. on Tres Bien and Mr. Porter starting July 17th.

Moksha August is a serial Four Pins commenter turned writer. I guess you could say that he started from the bottom. Haha, that's the spot. You can follow him on Twitter here.