Producer: Brad Paisley
When this song debuted and made waves earlier this year, I tried to see what everyone was talking about. Well, I heard the first 50 seconds and proceeded to close all my browser tabs. All of them. I damn near cleared my computer's cache-but then I thought better of it since I always forget my passwords. But it's Worst Song of 2013 time and there was no way I wasn't going to revisit this song.
Brad Paisley had to be quite heavy off the moonshine when he concocted this idea. Son penned a song about racial perception and tension. Not because it's been ingrained in the fabric of our country's existence...no. He did it because he was informed about the offense he caused a black barista when sporting a confederate flag T-shirt at his local Starbucks. I'm sure at the foundation of this there could be some good intention, but it's buried deep under the rubble of ridiculousness and white guilt.
Then LL jumps all the way out the window with ad-libs like, "If you don't judge my du-rag, I won't judge your red flag," and "If you don't judge my rope chains, I'll forget the iron chains." I guess LL donated all his FUBU to the less fortunate.
It's really hard not to burst out laughing at the idea of this. By the time he got through his first verse, I was like, "Wait... huh?" Only for him to belt out to the black race, "I'm just a white man, coming to you from a southland/Trying to understand what it's like not to be." After that, I immediately thought "Alright, my dude Brad is drunk. What's LL Cool J talking about?"
I mean...LL kind of tries to spit some real shit, but his delivery is dreadful over that scary-ass woman's chorus singing the melody. While all of this is going down, Cool J states he feels like a "newfangled Django." Then LL jumps all the way out the window with ad-libs like, "If you don't judge my du-rag, I won't judge your red flag," and "If you don't judge my rope chains, I'll forget the iron chains." I guess LL donated all his FUBU to the less fortunate.
All-in-all this is a failed attempt at patching up race relations that just comes off sounding totally stupid and unintentionally comedic. In the history of legendary interracial duos like Jules and Vincent, Chappelle and Brennan, or Andy and Jay, this country-rap tandem will hopefully be stricken from the books.
And for the brotha at that Starbucks in Tennessee...I see you fam. Hold your head bruh bruh. —Brandon Jenkins