As you may know, R. Kelly's Black Panties leaked this weekend. [Ed. note: I can not believe we just published that sentence.] But, yes, while the Pied Piper of R&B's twelfth studio solo album is not officially coming out until December 10, people with the Internet can hear the songs right now.
It's highly anticipated, this album, and a few first listens indicate that it doesn't disappoint. As an R. Kelly albums Black Panties is laced with love songs and padded with many an ode to lady-parts. For example, the album's centerpiece, "Marry The Pussy."
Kelly has long-standing track record of writing outrageously sexual lyrics and delivering them with "I Believe I Can Fly"-level sincerity. (Have you heard his recent duet with Justin Bieber? The part when he says, "I've been doing forensics on your body in the club..." That is a classic! What does that even mean?) Black Panties is no exception. Some of the words he sings are straightforward salacious; others, his winky brand of silly. We've gathered some of the standouts below. So step right up and get your The Most Ridiculous Sex Lyrics From R. Kelly's Black Panties... in a bunch.
"Bout to bang on the pussy like I'm throwing up 'Crip'..." — "Cookies"
"Make me put on a tux, break out a ring/'Cause this pussy is the realest pussy to me..." — "Marry The Pussy"
"Three bitches/One me/And they all on the dick/Call it 3D..." — "Spend That"
"No offense to the other artists/But come on dog, let's be honest/ How many babies been made off me?/OMG..." — "Shut Up"
"I'm a college grad, girl/I got my degree/I'm the head of my class/Tonight, you're lying with a sex genius..." — "Genius"
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