You guys still fuck with puffy vests? Probably not. You guys probably just swaddle yourselves in a bunch of antique cloth and old quilts. Well I still fuck with puffy vests because they are the shit. They go with everything. Okay, I gotta stop this is starting to read like a script for an infomercial. My bad. Anyways, I think I like puffy vests because one time I gave a North Face puffy vest to a girl when we were on a group camping trip at these sand dunes in Indiana and she was like, "Aww that's so sweet." Then she touched my elbow in that way that makes you think that the two of you are going to open a boutique hotel that is really a series of quaint, mid-century cottages somewhere and get featured on, like, The Coveteur as a power couple that has impeccable taste in furniture and your portrait will be both of you standing in an open floor plan kitchen with reclaimed wood floors and you'll both be barefoot and your dog will be lounging underneath a George Nelson bed in the foreground. I spent the rest of the night making sure she didn't fuck up my vest because it was a North Face vest and those aren't exactly cheap. We never ended up opening that boutique hotel, but we did make the 45 minute car ride home the next day really awkward for everyone.
