What it says: The most basic of ocular UV protection. Not that there's anything wrong with that—they're a classic for a reason. But if you're only rocking this one pair all 93 days of summer you're not projecting much in the way of style sensibilities. Your personality could range from ragetastic bro to cynical hipster to classic cool guy, but the day you lose your trusty shades is the saddest day of the summer.