Actually, you don't want to be caught perpetrating anything the three confused gentlemen above are doing. But let's focus on the fanny pack. If you're rocking one "ironically," guess what? The joke's still on you, jackass. And if you're genuinely a grown man, without children, who can't keep track of his cash and other belongings without a protruding kangaroo pouch, well then you deserve to lose everything you own, anyway.
Don't Get on Your Parents' Fanny Pack Wave