Chad "Please Don't Call Me Mr. Johnson" OchoCinco is back at it again. This time the Bengals receiver released two photos—via Twitter, of course—of what were thought to be two tattoos on his face. On his left cheek (pause) was the state of Florida, and on the right cheek (pause) he had two crosses. Turns out, though, that Carson Palmer's favorite ball-catcher was just trying to Ashton Kutcher the media, as retaliation for the way he thinks they treat him. Only problem was that homie's stunt got about as much buzz as a nun's vibrator.

But after seeing O.C. punk out of putting his face under the needle, we thought it would be a good time to salute those who have been brave enough to take some pricks to the grill. We aren't really too sure what the story is behind all these tattoos, but they're all worth a double-take when you see them in the streets...

kat_vond

KAT VON D:
TATTOO: Stars on the side of her face
STORY BEHIND IT: She's giving you a preview of her heavenly bodies.

gucci-mane2

GUCCI MANE
TATTOO: Tear drops under his left eye
STORY BEHIND IT: Whether or not there's a body behind those drops, we'd be crying too if we were lugging around those heavy-ass chains

mike-tyson

MIKE TYSON
TATTOO: Tribal symbol on the left side of his face
STORY BEHIND IT: It's actually a map: Driving Directions To Bankruptcy Court

danger

DANGER
TATTOO: Tiger on the side of her face
STORY BEHIND IT: Until she worked up the nerve to show the world her wild kitty, she figured a a tattoo would have to do.

lil-wayne

LIL WAYNE
TATTOO: "Fear God" over his eyelids
STORY BEHIND IT: He was one eye short of being able to rock the WEEZY-F-BABY triclops trilogy, so this was the second choice.

the-game-1

the-game-2

the-game-3

THE GAME

TATTOO: A butterfly, the letters LA, and a red star all in the same spot
STORY BEHIND IT: This is what happens when you bitch out of rocking something feminine and then can't make up your mind run out of space for tattoos

antwan-dixon

ANTWAN DIXON

TATTOO: A bunch of different shit all over his face
STORY BEHIND IT: Dixon? His face becomes him.

lizardman

THE LIZARD MAN
TATTOO: Green lizard scales all over his face
STORY BEHIND IT: White people be craaaaaaazy!