Amare Stoudemire, last seen leaving American Airlines Arena last night with his arm in a sling after tussling with a fire extinguisher, will be out for the remainder of the New York Knicks first round series with the Miami Heat, according to the Knicks' New York Times beat writer, Howard Beck. This should hardly come as a surprise, paramedics attended to Stoudemire after he knuckled up on the extinguisher and hands are an important part of a basketball players' arsenal. Still, Knicks fans can be forgiven for feeling quietly optimistic about the situation. Stoudemire was the team's best player—in January 2011—and with 'Melo now free to jack up 40 shots a game, who knows...psych! We are totally, fully, absolutely shitting with you right now. There's no way the Knicks beat the Heat, not with Stat, not without Stat, not with Anthony Davis, Patrick Ewing, Bill Bradley, and the ghost of Red Holzman. Sorry. Not. Gonna. Happen.