If all those orgasms you had after seeing Larry David's stupendous Bernie Sanders impression on Saturday Night Live made you feel near-Revenant levels of lonely, fear no more. Jennifer Lawrence, in a verbose chat with Glamour's editor-in-chief Cindi Leive, recently revealed exactly how the legend's take on Sanders really made her feel:
Glamour: Have you seen [Larry David’s] Bernie Sanders impression [on Saturday Night Live]?
JLaw: Yes! I masturbated to it. [Laughs.] Joking. Obviously didn’t.
Glamour: That might be the first time that sentence has ever been uttered.
JLaw: I’ll love him from afar. [Laughs.]
Glamour: In all seriousness, you were talking about the fact that guys don’t ask you out—
JLaw: No, it’s that I’m picky. I feel a spark very, very rarely. And it’s really only about spark for me. Not really anything else. You should see some of the people I find attractive. [Laughs.] You’d be shocked.
Glamour: Give me a random example.
JLaw: I gave Larry David my number. And he never called. [Laughs.]
Glamour: He might have been like, “That chick is 40 years younger than me. I’m not calling her.” He has a moral compass.
JLaw: Which makes him even more attractive. I love that he didn’t call me. It makes him so much hotter.
In the utopian version of American pop culture (the achievement of which any serious presidential candidate would consider his or her top priority), Jennifer Lawrence would become Larry David's love interest in the critically acclaimed ninth season of confirmed modern bible Curb Your Enthusiasm.
At any rate, do with this footage what you will: