What's wrong with you people?
Bill Hader, top 5 dead or alive Saturday Night Live cast member, returned to host last night. But guess what, you didn't watch, you ungrateful member of the highly important 18 to 49-year-old demographic.
Deadline reports that last night's episode tied for the show's worst ratings of all time with 18 to 49-year-olds, a record previously set only last season when Charlize Theron hosted. It scored a 3.8/9 in metered-market households and a 1.8/8 in adults 18-49 in the Local People Meters (whatever the fuck that means, it's apparently really bad).
So what, were you too busy having a life outside your home on a Saturday night to watch? Do you even realize that you missed this?
Listen, I don't want to scare anybody, but if these ratings don't improve, other networks might consider creating shows to compete with SNL. Do I really have to type the word(s) MADtv?