You're more self-aware than people want to give you credit for, sometimes providing witty remarks and responses that catch people off guard. You're lovably annoying to your closest friends that truly "get" you, but to others you're often a second away from getting beat.
You're a slacker; if you're not eating a burger in your underwear in your apartment that your parents pay for, you're just sleeping the day away and dreaming about eating burgers. You could be a touring drummer or a part of the Jackass team (if you already weren't), but you aren't motivated enough to do it.
Your saving grace? You're a low-key philosophical genius. People laughed when you asked if mayonnaise was an instrument, but maybe you were getting at something deeper.