Cannibal appeal: Delicious
Possible last day activity: Seeing how many Freaks & Geeks lines he can complete on the spot
How good are their jokes?: Hold on to your dick, lest you laught it right off
Potential attributes for fighting off danger: Two words: Green Hornet (i.e., you're fucked if the horde arrives)
Likelihood that they'll have drugs: "The odds can't get no better" *Bone Thugs sing-songy voice*
Verdict: It'll be just like that day you and your freshman-year roommate did mushrooms and walked around the quad, all sunny and bright.