The 25 Douchiest Bars in Austin

In hopes of helping you avoid the fate of a douche-filled night we present The 25 Douchiest Bars in Austin.

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Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

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Austin is a liberal oasis in a Texas sea so red it would make Moses blush. One of the country’s largest universities provides a large youth population (read: amateurs) and a pulsing nightlife that rivals any city on either coast. Considered "The Live Music Capital of the World," Austin hosts diverse acts ranging from country to hip-hop seven nights a week, as well as the slurring groupies that faithfully follow them. With a rowable lake running through the city, bountiful hiking trails, and wonderful weather year round, Austin is also home to hoards of health-obsessed people doing cheerfully granola things.

But fear not, fans of the douche! Worming through the city is a thick artery of self-centered, entitled revelers, threatening to keep Austin more douchey than weird. It is in hopes of helping you avoid that fate that we present The 25 Douchiest Bars in Austin.

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25. Dogwood

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24. Logan's on Sixth

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23. The Mean-Eyed Cat

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22. Cheers Shot Bar

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21. Geisha Room

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20. Touché

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19. Dizzy Rooster

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18. Lustre Pearl

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17. Coyote Ugly Saloon

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16. Iron Cactus

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15. Molotov Lounge

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Address: 719 West 6th St.
Website: molotovlounge.com

Let’s say you’re a girl and you’re not particularly drunk and you're uninterested in strange men grinding themselves on you, uninvited. If this is the case, run, don't walk, far away from Molotov Lounge. Once the DJ starts pumpin’ the jams, you will get humped upon by some of the grimiest singles to ever grace the dance floor. If you attempt to escape to the upstairs rooftop bar, you'll find yourself faced with the same sweaty specimens from downstairs, who have taken a break from dancing. Except for in their hearts. In their hearts, the beat goes on.

14. J. Black's Feel Good Kitchen & Lounge

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13. Scholz Garten

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12. The Chuggin' Monkey

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11. Friends Bar

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10. The Library

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9. Recess Arcade Bar

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8. The Ranch

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7. Cain and Abel's

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6. Fado Irish Pub

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5. The Aquarium

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4. Champions

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3. Bikini’s

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2. Pete's Dueling Piano Bar

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1. Cool River Cafe

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