The 8 mega-pixel camera on your iPhone 5 is impressive and Siri definitely has her moments, but dammit if that thing doesn't have the worse internal speaker this side of Koss.

We don't care that your headphones are so loud that we can pick up every lyric on Nicki Minaj's "Starships." We're worried about your ears. However, if you lack the restraint to not carelessly blast Ca$h Out from your phone's internal speaker, sans headphones, you deserve a Ron Artest elbow to your eye ball. Just buy a pair of ear buds. At CVS, they're $5 dollars. No more excuses.