If you're a casual strip club customer, understanding and exploiting the unspoken rules and etiquette of the club will maximize your enjoyment. In order to improve your consumer experience, you need to avoid these common mistakes that can kill your boner, waste your money, or get you subpar customer service.

Heed this advice and it'll improve your odds of having a good time with fun strippers and leaving the club with your bank account, self-respect, and iPhone intact.

Written by Bubbles Burbujas (@StripperTweets), a career stripper who hopes her boss doesn't find out about her writing work. 

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