45-year-old Ramey Newkirk was arrested last week after cracking his 65-year-old mother over the head with a bottle of eggnog. Pasco County deputies responded to the call of a concerned neighbor, who relayed Sandra Newkirk's account of abuse from her son. She was hesitant about providing more information because her son allegedly threatened to kill her if she told anyone.
What would make a man assault his mother with a bottle of holiday cheer? The younger Newkirk couldn't provide any type of justification, so he went with the predictable cop out, saying that he "blacked out." During this lapse in memory and judgement, his mother claims that he also hit her with an Oxygen tank and stun gun.
If you're wondering what happened to Newkirk's holiday spirit, just know that this apparently is his holiday spirit, as it went down in Holiday, Florida. Newkirk was charged with aggravated battery of a person 65 years of age or older, tampering with a witness and grand theft. It's time for him to do some Christmas shopping. For a lawyer.