Guard, New York Knicks

DUI's are a rite of passage for folks in The Hamptons, like a first hair cut for rich people. Jason Kidd endeared himself to the neighborhood with one hell of a impaired joy ride to his newly acquired, $6M mansion.

After making an appearance for a charity that raises money to "empower and inspire youth in foster care," Kidd went clubbing. Naturally. Kidd hit the SL East nightclub so hard that, according to a witness, he was carried out after trying to swing from a light fixture and ripping it out of the ceiling. 

From there, police allege that the Knicks guard blew a stop sign and crashed into a telephone pole, snapping the pole in half as his SUV skidded into a nearby wooded area. An officer noted that Kidd smelled of alcohol and was unsteady on his feet when he was discovered at the scene of the car crash.